


We Found It In The Hedgerow

by MaximumMarygold



Series: Bella Baggins Gets Stuff Done [1]
Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Also Fili is a fashion design major who enjoys using Bella as his barbie, Because there is a scene in here where Bilbo being Bella makes everything 845874844x funnier ok, Dancer!Bilbo, Enemies to Lovers, F/M, Female!Bilbo, Minor Character Death, Slow Build, The North & South AU No One Asked For, They kind of hate each other at first, fem!Bilbo, like glacial
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-20
Updated: 2015-05-20
Packaged: 2018-03-31 11:59:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 30,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3977227
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MaximumMarygold/pseuds/MaximumMarygold
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bella Baggins thought she had everything she needed in the Shire. But then Dís Durin offered her a position with her dance company and before she knew it she was living in Erebor, miles and miles away from everything she had ever known, miles and miles away from home.</p><p>In which Thorin has trouble expressing his feelings in a mature manner, Fili and Kili like to play dress up with Bella, Dís stands back and watches, and Bella tries to figure out what in her life has lead to THIS fiasco.</p><p>(The Bagginshield North & South AU)</p>
            </blockquote>





	We Found It In The Hedgerow

**Author's Note:**

> HAVE YOU WATCHED NORTH & SOUTH? NO? WELL THIS IS A N&S AU SO ONCE YOU'RE DONE READING THIS GO WATCH THAT. LOVE YOURSELF. AND CIRCA 2004 RICHARD ARMITAGE.

Miss. Belladonna Baggins ( _Miss_ , not Mrs. Mrs. Belladonna Baggins was her mother.) had thought that she would spend all of her life in the Shire of Hobbiton; an unpopular plan in 2015 but it was hers. It was home, and she had a wonderful house on Bag End, and a job that she loved teaching ballet to children.

She had never thought of wishing for more, of wishing for an adventure in the great wide somewhere. Or at least, she had never thought of speaking those wishes _aloud._

Which is why when Dis Durin of The Company (of Dance) called her personally she nearly fainted on the spot. They were looking to expand their company, Dis had said, and apparently Bella had been recommended by a mutual friend, Gandalf Grey.

Bella had thought of refusing, afraid of what an adventure of that magnitude would hold. She would have to move to Erebor, a city as far to the north as Hobbiton was to the south, and as someone who had never left home and had no plans to ever do so... it was terrifying.

But exciting.

So she went. She packed up her belongings and left the house in the tender loving care of her dear cousin Drogo and his wife Prim (who was expecting their first child), and moved into a tiny studio apartment in Erebor where Pinterest became her best friend and she spent way too much money on Etsy trying to make her apartment feel like home.

Who knew so many things could be made with bell jars?

Erebor was cold in every sense of the word. Having lived for nearly thirty years in a land that was primarily green it was a nasty shock to suddenly find herself in an almost wasteland of frigid weather. It was nearly May and snow was still on the ground; the windows of Bella’s little apartment frosted over every morning when she woke, bundled in six different blankets in her bed in the alcove overlooking the rest of her apartment.

That alcove was her favorite part of the whole place; technically it was a second floor overlooking the living room with a ladder instead of stairs and a clear plexiglass railing so she didn’t fall, but it was just wide enough for her queen size bed and a small table to put her phone on while it charged and exactly the right amount of space above her so she didn’t crack her head on the ceiling every time she sat up, and it felt like an alcove, not a floor (when she’d E-mailed pictures to Prim shortly after moving in her cousin had used the term “Compact Chic" and while a little pretentious, Bella thought it fit rather nicely) There was a window, small like the one in her laundry room back home, at the back of it where her head rested that let in the cool, cloudy sunlight.

It was _nice_.

She crawled out of bed at eleven and dragged herself down the ladder, hissing when her feet touched the cold wooden floor. “What I wouldn’t give for a warm day.” She mumbled, padding over to the kitchen corner and starting the coffee.

Sunday’s were her one day off. The day she could stay inside her apartment, wrap herself in blankets, and do absolutely nothing. Except maybe write to her cousin while she drank her coffee and picked idly at a blueberry scone.

_Dear Prim,_

_I know that people rarely exchange letters anymore, but I thought it would give us something to do; me while I am stuck in this… place… and you while you’re in on bed rest._

_It is so lonely here, Prim, without you and Drogo only an apartment over. And so unfriendly; nothing like Home where everyone knows everyone and is just as likely to come round for tea._

_And it’s so cold here! There isn’t a beach in sight, and I haven’t seen the color green in so long that I’m beginning to forget what it looks like. I’m sure, now, that I have seen hell, cousin, and it is white: Snow white._

_And don’t even get me started on Thorin Oakenshield! Arrogant as he is handsome. And I’m sad to report that he is, in fact, extraordinarily handsome. He runs the mine on the East side of town; I only know him because his sister is Dis Durin; yes that Dis Durin, the lady who offered me the position with The Company in the first place._

_How I wish I could pop him in his nose, sometimes!_

_Oh, Prim, I do hope this move was worth it. I hate to think I moved across the country for nothing._

_All my love,_

_Bella._

Bella put her pen down and bit the inside of her cheek, worrying it between her teeth. She shouldn't have mentioned Thorin. And especially not how handsome he was, even if most of his good looks were beaten off by his attitude. He was as cold as Erebor itself and twice as unpredictable.

The first time Bella had seen him, on a tour of the city with Dis’s two energetic sons, he had beaten a man senseless for lighting up a cigarette in his mine,

Not that Bella was saying that fire anywhere near a coal mine that probably produced a good amount of methane gas was a good idea, because it sounded like a very, very bad idea that could get a lot of people killed.

But Bella maintained that violence was never the answer.  

Two quick knocks on Bella’s front door nearly made her groan. It was _Sunday_. Her one day.

Fili and Kili Durin, however, were not the lightest bit daunted by Bella’s old, threadbare Hobbiton University sweatshirt and dark attitude, pushing past her and staring around them in awe.

“It’s so small,” Kili mumbled.

“But it’s so _nice_.” Fili added.

“Much nicer than uncle’s house. Big, bare old thing that it is.” Kili turned his bright smile on Bella, “Well, go on, get dressed.”

Bella stayed where she was, crossing her arms over her chest a little self consciously, completely aware of the fact that she had forgone a bra that morning because she was supposed to spend the day cooped up in her apartment _alone_. “Why?” She asked.

“Because you’ve been here three weeks and haven’t spoken to anyone or done anything except dance.” Fili wrinkled his nose.

And he was right, to be honest. The perpetual ache in every single one of Bella’s muscles were enough proof that _all_ she had done was dance.

“That is what I’m here for, you know.” She said dryly, “I moved to this godforsaken place to dance. Not to party and not to make friends.” She shrugged, “And besides, I doubt that there is much around here that I would like to do.”

“What do you mean?” Kili asked, making himself at home on her sofa; a very soft teal and white thing that was perfect for a long day of doing absolutely nothing.

“There’s no... culture here. It’s all money and smoke. It’s what people around here seem to breathe.” She paused then added, “Plus, it’s very cold outside and I simply do not want to go anywhere.”

Fili laughed, “You’re blunt.  I like you.” He stretched out next to his brother, “And while we don’t have much in the way of museums and such aside from Mum’s studio, we do have a few rather pleasant parks.”  

Bella perked up, “Parks? Like... with trees and flowers?”

“Well, I can’t promise you flowers. There’s still snow on the ground.” Fili slung an arm lazily around Kili’s shoulders, “But there are trees. And it is rather pretty if you can get over the smoky air.” There was a wry smile playing across his lips.

“Erebor is the kind of place you grow to love.” Kili promised. “Now go get dressed.” He fidgeted impatiently, “I told Tauriel I’d meet her at one.”

“Ohhhh, you told _Tauriel_.” Fili teased.

“Tauriel Evangeline?” Bella asked, still standing rather awkwardly near her doorway. “From The Company?”

Kili smiled dreamily, “Yes.”

“Uncle hates her.” Fili rolled his eyes, “Even though she dances with Mum.”

“Why?” Bella stepped further into her house, her arms wrapping tighter around herself to ward off the cold, her red-tipped toes wiggling to try and keep circulation going. She really needed to start wearing her slippers.

“She’s Thranduil’s niece.” Kili mumbled, deflating, “He owns the mine on the other side of town. He’s kind of a dick.”

“And he and uncle have never seen eye to eye.” Fili sighed, gazing at his baby brother sadly. The poor thing looked like someone had stepped on his kitten.

Bella sighed and made her way over to the makeshift closet she’d made from two bookshelves and an old curtain rod. She vaguely noticed Fili and Kili coming up behind her like the nosy little beasts they were.

“That’s pretty.” Kili noticed, reaching over her shoulder to pluck at the sleeve of the cream sweater dress Prim had given her before she’d moved, claiming she was going to need something warm and sexy for the cold climate.

Bella tugged it from his grasp, “That’s extremely short and far too fancy for a walk in the park.”

“What about this?” Fili’s fingers closed on her favorite, green coat. “And this?” This time it was a pale blue dress Bella had honestly forgotten she owned.

“I’ve never worn that.” She admitted, “And why are you giving me fashion advice?”

“Because I help my mother with the outfits for her shows.” Fili grinned, “I have an eye for it.”

“He’s in school for fashion design.” Kili whispered loudly earning himself a scowl from his older brother. “Well you are! And it’s why you’re giving her fashion advice!”

Bella sighed and pulled the dress from the rack, wandering into the tiny bathroom to change. When the dress was zipped she finally allowed herself to look in the mirror- she looked like she planned on staying in and it made her wince. She wasn’t fit for company at all.

“I’ll do your hair!” Kili called from outside the door, “So just put on the dress and we’ll take care of everything else.”

Bella huffed out a deep breath through clenched teeth and counted to ten before she threw open the door, “Why?”

“That color really works for you.” Fili beamed, wrapping long fingers around Bella’s arm and hauling her from the bathroom and into a chair that one of them had obviously pulled away from the island that doubled as her kitchen table.

“I never agreed to whatever it is you’re planning.” She complained, slapping Kili’s impatient fingers away from her hair.

“We’re taking you to the park.” Kili whined, “But we have to stop by and see Mum first and if Fili and I make you gorgeous,” he pat her cheek and added on a, “more gorgeous,” at her dirty look, “then it reflects very well upon us.”

“You want to make me up to impress your mother?”

They both nodded earnestly and Bella sighed, dropping her hands into her lap, defeated. “Alright.”

It took them about fifty minutes, but by the end of it Bella’s hair was done up in an elaborate braid and her eyelashes were so long she had to wear her contacts instead of her glasses. The red lips were a little much and she had to consciously stop herself from chewing all the stain off.

But she did look good, even if she didn’t exactly look like her.

“It’s... nice, boys.” She told them, staring at her reflection with an expression that looked to be one part awe two parts hesitation.

“Nice?” Fili asked. “Just nice?”

“It doesn’t really feel like me.” She fidgeted nervously under their stare.

Kili and Fili shared a look. “Okay,” Kili finally said, “We’ll try again.”

“What?” Bella blinked twice.

They’d just spent almost an hour doing _that_ and now they were going to start all over again?

“You’re not comfortable.” Fili said gently, ushering her back into the chair. “We’re going to fix that.”

They kept all of the foundation, so it took less time the second go around. The eyelashes stayed, as did the thin layer of liner on her top lid, but the red lipstick was switched out for something more neutral and her hair fell in loose curls that were half-pinned back away from her face.

This she liked.

“Much better.” She smiled gratefully.

“Really?” Kili asked, his eyes lighting up.

“Really, really.” She reached behind her and grabbed his and Fili’s hands. “Actually, if you have time I was wondering if you would teach me how you did this?”

And oh, there was a surefire way to excite the sons of Dís Durin: ask them to give you hair and makeup tips.

****  
  


Dís was in her office, which surprised exactly no one. If the boy’s hadn’t assured Bella that she came home every night Bella would be sure that the woman actually lived there.

Thorin was also in Dís’ office, which is what caught Bella off guard.

“Oh.” She breathed as the boys pulled her through the door, and suddenly she felt a little silly for letting herself be dragged out of her house. She knew how immature she must appear, arm and arm in two boys under the age of twenty three, her face flushed from the cold and from laughter, her carefully done hair windswept and scattered with the slowly falling snow.

As she blinked she realized there was even snow in her eyelashes.

“Miss. Baggins!” Dís smiled when she saw her and even then her resemblance to her perpetually scowling brother was striking. They could have been twins, though Bella knew that Thorin was a few years older. “I see my sons have succeeded in dragging you from your hobbit hole.”

Bella ducked her head, though she was smiling, “I didn’t have much of a choice in the matter, truthfully. They sat on my sofa and fed me a sad story until I relented.” She paused and looked at Kili out of the corner of her eye, “Actually, I’m starting to think it’s all a load of dung because he was supposed to meet someone at one.” It was ten after.

“I texted her and told her we’d be late.” Kili waved his hand, completely unconcerned.

“Well, either way,” Dís said, rolling her eyes at her youngest son, “I don’t think you’ve gotten to meet my older brother.”

“We have met.” Thorin spoke for the first time, stepping up next to his sister and gazing at Bella with a look she couldn’t read. “I’m afraid I made a bad first impression.”

“Bad or fucking terrible, ta-may-toe or ta-mah-to.” Bella said conversationally, shrugging. The swear word felt weird in her mouth, having only said it a handful of times in her life, but she was going for shock factor (being much smaller and less physically intimidating than Dís’ brother) and it got the desired result.

Thorin looked surprised and a little embarrassed, “I uh... she happened upon me disciplining one of my workers.”

“You mean I saw you beating a man half your size.” Bella was less conversational now, her arms crossed over her chest.

“Bella...” Fili hissed urgently.

“No, she’s right.” Thorin shifted back on his heels, mirroring Bella’s stance with his arms folded over his chest, “You know my temper. And fire is the greatest unnecessary risk in my mine.”

“So you resort to violence?” Bella shot back.

“I dare say, Miss. Baggins, that an explosion and the resulting corpses of every man, woman, and child in the area would be more violence than a few bruises.” Thorin’s jaw tightened, the veins on the side of his neck protruding in his anger.

Bella thought he looked a little like a dragon about to breathe fire over the lot of them and wisely didn’t say anything, though she did narrow her own eyes.

“Maybe we should go.” Fili mumbled.

“Probably.” Kili whispered back, though he straightened his spine and beamed at his mother, “Doesn’t she look great, though, Mum? Fee did her make up and I did her hair.” His exuberance reminded Bella of an excited puppy.

Dís’ eyes roamed down Bella so intensely that she wanted to shrink into herself and hide behind the boys. But she didn’t because Thorin was also staring at her and she was not going to give him the satisfaction.

“You look lovely, Miss. Baggins.” She said, finally.

“Bella.” Bella corrected automatically.

“Bella.” Dís agreed, “Thorin,” She said sharply, “doesn’t Bella look lovely.”

Thorin grunted something that sounded vaguely affirmative and then hissed as his sister dug her elbow into his ribs, “You look lovely, Bella.” He ground out.

Bella sniffed petulantly, “It’s Miss. Baggins to you.” She said, delighting in being able to catch Thorin off guard for a second time, “Good day, Dís. Mr. Oakenshield."

She strode from the room with Fili and Kili valiantly trying to cover up their giggles with twin sudden and ferocious coughing fits.

They didn’t speak until they were outside again and then Kili started in, “That was the best thing I’ve ever seen!” He exclaimed, clapping his hands together. “No one ever gives it back to Uncle except Mum!”

“And she’s his baby sister so giving him hell is practically her day job.” Fili added, smiling widely. “That was pretty awesome.” He admitted.

“He did have a point.” Bella mumbled, “An explosion would have been terrible, though I still think he could have just fired that man without losing his temper so violently.”

“And you didn’t tell him that because?” Kili asked.

“Because I couldn’t let him win, dear.” Bella rolled her eyes. “Be reasonable.”

* * *

Thorin Oakenshield sat heavily in the chair in front of his sister’s desk. He hadn’t meant to anger her; Bella Baggins had caught him off guard twice now: once when she appeared in his mine, tiny and frail and so very close to that idiot lighting up a cigarette and then again, moments ago, in Dís’, office when she told him off in front of his nephews and proved that while she was tiny, frail was the wrong word.

Fierce.

She was tiny and fierce.

And beautiful.

Mahal was she beautiful.

But gently beautiful, not the obvious, lustrous beautiful of Tauriel, the object of his nephew’s affections, or Thranduil himself, but the kind of beautiful that came with laughter that crinkled eyes and left dimples etched into cheeks. Less obvious, just as radiant.

Not that Thorin was ever going to be able to make her laugh.

Dís was staring at him, eyebrows raised in challenge. “Brother?”

Thorin dragged a hand across his face, “That could have gone better.”

“Yes, it could have.” She agreed, “And you’re going to have to make nice with her, she’s one of my best and the only one who isn’t an obnoxious twit. I will not have you running her off with your temper, are we clear?”

And honestly his sister was a little terrifying when she was in a good mood, which she definitely was not at present, so Thorin simply nodded. He had no intention on running Miss. Baggins off anywhere.

“Good.” Dís smiled smugly, “Now, what had you storming in here in the first place?”

Thorin’s face fell, “There are talks of a strike in the mines.”

“ _A strike_?” Dís hissed, her hands slamming down onto the hard top of her desk, all traces of good humor gone, “What is this 1990?”

“That would explain Dwalin’s wardrobe.” Thorin mumbled, something in his gut loosening as the corner of Dís’ mouth quirked up. The situation was still bleak, but maybe not as bleak as it could be if his sister was still able to smile, “What do I do, Dís?”

“Aren’t you the older brother in this relationship?” She asked, running a hand through her thick, dark hair. “You carry on as usual.”

“As usual?”

“Yes.” Dís rolled her eyes, and Thorin wondered if he looked that intimidating when he did the same thing... probably not. “You get up at the asscrack of dawn, you go to work, you get gross in that smoky, dirty mine, you come home, you argue with Fili and Kili, you go to bed, you do it all over again.”

“Your advice is to do nothing while my staff plots against me?” He asked, incredulous. This was a horrible plan.

“My advice is to act as though you aren’t phased.” She said, “They know you know, correct?” Thorin nodded. “Then act unphased. Who knows, maybe they’ll realize how stupid they’re being on their own time.” She paused, “What are they striking for?”

Thorin wondered if he looked as lost as he felt, “They say their hours are too long, like I’m not there as long as they are, _longer_ , like I don’t know how hard the days are. They want me to hire more workers, split up shifts, but they’re like Fili and Kili when they were young. They don’t understand that the money for that just isn’t there. I can hire more people, yes, but the profits won’t hold up to that and we’d close in a year.” There was a throbbing somewhere near his left temple and he reached up to rub at it absently, “I want to, Dís, I really do. But I’m already behind on payments to Gandalf and family friend or not this can’t hold up for that much longer.”

Dís was quiet for a moment, “Is it really as bad as all that, Thorin?”

Thorin nodded, “I didn’t want to worry you.”

Her hand reached absently for her Book; the big Book, the important Book, the Book that held every single bit of information about her studio.

“No, Dís.” Thorin shook his head, “This isn’t your fight.”*

“The hell it isn’t.” Dís nearly growled, “Let me help.”

“The Company is all you have, the studio is all you have. I will not have you compromising that. Not now, not ever.” The very thought made him balk, the blood draining from his face until he felt a little faint.

“And what of the mine?” Dís asked, “What of all _you_ have?”

“I will manage. Just as I always have.” Thorin reached out and caught his sister’s fingers, squeezing them reassuringly, “I’ll manage.” He said again, wondering how many times he’d have to say it to make himself believe it.

“Should we cancel the party?” Dís worried her lower lip between her teeth and Thorin tightened his grip on her hand.

“No.” He said, “No, you’re right. We’re going to carry on as usual.” For as long as they could.

* * *

****  
  


When Frodo was born Bella got an honest to God phone call from her cousin. Fili was half through lacing Bella into the monster of a dress she had to wear for _Swan Lake_ and suddenly Kili was shoving her phone into her hand looking pale.

“There’s a man shouting and a woman screaming.” He said, his eyes wide. “The I.D said Drogo.”

Bella snatched the phone from his hand, breathing out, “Is is time?” As Fili tightened the laces even further.

If this is how women dressed back in the day then Bella was immensely glad she was born in the twentieth century. She could barely _breathe_ , let alone speak. And the situation definitely called for deep, calming breaths as Prim shrieked in the background.

“It’s time.” Drogo confirmed, sounding harried.

Bella bit down on her lip, pleading a moment from Fili who was standing around holding the top layer of her skirt and waiting. “My show is about to start.” She said.

“I’ll keep you posted via text?”

“Please don’t send me any pictures of Prim’s privates.” Bella quickly said, wincing at the idea. “I have no plans on ever having children so I don’t need such an in depth play by play.” She caught Dís’ eye and smiled apologetically. “I have to go, keep me posted.” Prim screamed again and Bella’s eyes widened, _“Okay **really** havetogo,”_ She said very quickly, _“Iloveyoubye_!” She hung up and flung the phone away from her like it was set to explode.

That whole situation was one big pile of  _nope_ and suddenly Bella was more than glad to be far, far away from the action in Hobbiton.

“Trouble in paradise?” Dís asked, a wry smile hanging around her mouth.

“My cousin’s wife is having a baby.” Bella said faintly, “And really he’s more like my brother and he already told me that they were going to have the lad call me Auntie so... I’m going to be an Auntie?”

Dís laughed and dropped her hand upon Bella’s shoulder, giving it a squeeze. “Congratulations.”

 

Bella danced as if in a trance, and to be quite honest she couldn’t tell one bit if it went well or not until she was tackled in a hug as the curtain closed.

“Boys!” She yelped as someone -probably Kili- tread on the hem of her dress and nearly sent her toppling over. “Boys, come on I need my phone.”

“Oh, Drogo texted you.” Kili said, producing Bella’s phone from the pocket of his slacks, “She had the baby and he’s the cutest thing I’ve ever seen, Bell, seriously.”

Bella grabbed the phone, scrolling through the multitude of pictures that Drogo had sent her. Little Frodo was unfairly adorable, with a tuft of curly dark hair and wide blue eyes laying across Prim’s chest as she smiled tiredly up at the camera.

“Aw, look at that little nugget.” Bella cooed, “He’s so precious.” She grinned like an idiot at her phone, looking up and turning that grin on Dís as the woman wandered over. “She had the baby.” She said, clasping her phone to her chest. “They named him Frodo.”

“Pictures, woman, pictures.” Dís demanded, crowding in close and make an approving noise in the back of her throat, “He is a cute one, isn’t he? Look at that nose.”

“I know.” Bella beamed, tucking her phone in her pocket as Thorin made his way over with an aged man who bore resemblance to both Thorin and his sister. “Hello, Mr. Oakenshield.”

“Hello.” Both men replied.

Bella’s eyes widened. “Oh. You must be Dís’ father.” He’d been mentioned in passing a couple of times, though Bella hadn’t thought she’d ever meet him.

“I’m Thrain, yes." He said, “Boys,” The old man addressed, “get off of Miss. Baggins.”

“Bella.” She corrected, smiling, “And it’s quite alright. I’m used to them at this point.” She looped an arm around Fili and Kili’s waists, “They’re quite lively. They bring some light into my dull old life.”

“You act like you’re ninety instead of not-even-thirty and gorgeous.” Kili said, rolling his eyes. “I’m pretty sure even Uncle thinks that you’re the prettiest thing this side of Rivendale and I’m not positive he’s even human.”

Thorin’s eyebrows rose. “Are you implying that I’m secretly a velociraptor?”

“No.” Kili grinned impishly and Bella pinched his side like that would stop him from saying whatever it was he was about to say, “I’m flat out saying that you think Bella is too hot.”

“Hot damn.” Fili piped up from Bella’s other side.

Bella hissed out a breath through her teeth, extracting herself from the brother’s grip and smiling apologetically at Thrain and Dís , “I’m terribly sorry but I told my cousin I would call as soon as the show ended.” She excused herself and quickly fled far, far away from Thorin Oakenshield and his incorrigible nephews.

She felt eyes on her as she went and dared to look over her shoulder. Thorin’s gaze was intense on her back -not her backside she noticed- though he quickly looked away when he saw her looking, the tips of his ears going red in embarrassment at being caught staring.

Bella’s own cheeks flushed for another reason entirely and she quickly looked away, a little annoyed with herself for getting such pleasure out of holding his attention. She blamed it on a lack of oxygen from the stupid corset being too tight and quickly set off for the dressing room.

She decided to call Prim first, since should she and her husband decided to try and share the finer points of childbirth -a phenomenon that Bella had absolutely no plan of ever experiencing herself- she would have a solid excuse to quickly get off the phone before they scarred her for life.

Her cousin was tired, yet very, very pleased with herself when she answered the phone.

“‘Ello, Bella-Boo.” Prim mumbled, and Bella could hear the sleepy smile in her voice, having spent many a night sleeping beside her when they were children. “How was your day?”

“A sight less eventful than yours, I’d dare to say.” Bella reached up and pulled out the four pins holding her hair up, letting the strawberry blonde curls tumble down her back with the satisfied sigh of someone whose hair had been pinned up long past the point of being comfortable. “He’s beautiful, Prim.”

“He is, isn’t he?” Prim said with barely contained glee, “He has Drogo’s eyes.”

“Does he, now?” Bella leaned against the wall of her personal dressing room, pleased to have some of the weight off of her sore legs. “Has he burst your eardrums yet?”

“He’s certainly tried.”

Bella laughed, the knot that had been tightening in her chest the longer she stayed in Erebor loosening the slightest bit, “Oh, I’m so glad to hear your voice, Prim.”

“You’d hear it more if you’d call instead of writing me novels.” Prim pointed out dryly.

“That is true.” Bella agreed, “I think I’ll do that. This is the twenty first century, after all.”

“That it is.” Prim said, yawning as soon as she’d finished.

“Okay, sweetie, you get some sleep. You’ve had a long day.” Bella paused, “I miss you.”

“I miss you too, Bunny. Bye.”

“Bye, Prim.” Bella hung up the phone but didn’t put it down, tightening her hand into a tight first around it while she fought back the sting of tears in her eyes.

She was not going to cry, not now when the ridiculous amount of makeup Fili had put on her would run along with the tears and then everyone would know she was crying and feel bad for her.

“I need to get out of this dress.” She mumbled, finally loosening her grip on the phone and letting it fall onto her vanity with a quiet thump.

Bella got the first layer of the dress off without much trouble, but the corset she was forced to don by Fili was another story entirely. Try as she might, even turned around so she could see what she was doing in the mirror if she craned her neck, she could not get those infernal laces undone.

She would take a deep breath and try again if she _could_ take a deep breath. “Damn it.” She mumbled, giving up and deciding to go find Fili. He was going to undo the laces for her or she was going to scramble his brains.

Bella threw open her dressing room door and promptly walked face first into a brick wall. She stumbled back, rubbing her nose. “Damn it!” She said again. She was scared to look up to see who she’d run into.

“Miss. Baggins? Are you alright?”

Thorin Oakenshield was in Bella’s dressing room. What was Thorin Oakenshield doing in Bella’s dressing room?

“What are you doing in my dressing room?” She asked, finally.

“One of the girls spilled wine down their dress.” He said, shuffling a little awkwardly, “Fili is dealing with that and may be otherwise engaged for a while so he asked me to come down here and see if you needed help with your dress.”

“Me, specifically?” Bella asked, scowling, “Or just in generally anyone who’s still stuck in this thing.”

“You, specifically.” Thorin answered, “Since you disappeared quite suddenly before he could unlace your corset.”

Bella’s scowl deepened. She wasn’t even sure why she was so annoyed at Thorin’s presence, other than the fact that he was a bit of an ass the last two times they’d met; he hadn’t said anything to offend her recently.

But she was annoyed at him, and his stupid deep voice, and his stupid blue eyes, and his stupid dark hair that fell into his stupidly handsome face.

She was stupidly annoyed at his stupid everything.

“I had to call my cousin.” Bella bit out, turning around and crossing her arms over her chest.

Thorin hummed, “You said that. You should lean against your vanity when I let you out of of this.”

“Why?” Bella looked over her shoulder, eyebrows furrowing in confusion.

“Because this instrument of torture has been restricting blood flow for the last couple of hours,” Thorin explained patiently, “and it can make you dizzy when it’s released.”

Bella’s scowl softened, “Oh.” She mumbled facing forward again and taking the few steps necessary to put her in front of the vanity. She bent at the waist slightly, bracing herself on the table and wrapping her fingers around the edge. “Like this?”

“Uh... yes. Yes, like that.” Thorin’s voice was slightly choked off and when Bella peered up at the mirror, where she could see both their reflections, his face was red.

Bella suddenly realized how else her current position could be used, how it would look to anyone who just walked in and happened to see them and her cheeks flushed in turn.

“Stop staring,” She hissed, “and let me out of this thing before I pass out.”

Thorin stumbled forward, mumbling apologies. Bella barely repressed a shiver when his fingers brushed against the bare skin of her shoulders as he pushed the long curtain of her hair away so it didn’t get tangled. His skin was very warm.

It was incredibly intimate, Thorin close behind her, his breath fluttering the shorter strands of her hair as his fingers made quick work of the laces.

The last knot came undone and the fabric and boning of the corset and attached skirt fell to the floor uncaringly and as the dizziness that Thorin had warned her of subsided Bella remembered with a short shriek of utter mortification that she wasn’t able to wear a bra with that corset. Her arms flew to cover her now naked chest but she caught sight of Thorin’s expression in the mirror behind her and knew that he’d seen; there had been a good thirty seconds before she’d realized she was topless and there was one thing that could bring _that_ look to a man’s face.

Being seen in a bra and panties was one thing; it was the same as a swimsuit. But just panties?

And they weren't even her nice panties. They weren't lace or satin; they were teal blue cotton with print. _Panda_ print.

She was standing in front of Thorin Oakenshield in naught but her panda bear panties.

“Oh my God.” Bella whimpered, dropping her head so her hair covered her face. “Oh my God.”

Thorin quickly stripped off his own coat, draping it over Bella’s shoulders and taking special care to keep his eyes averted. “Do you... do you have a shirt in here?”

“My clothes are over there.” She pointed with one arm, keeping the other clamped tightly over her breasts. “Please just throw them over here and go.” She squeaked and only once the door was shut behind Thorin and her clothes were held tightly in her arms did she let the full force of her blush reign.

Yavanna help her she had to be red to her toes.

Oh God, if Thorin told Fili and Kili he was never going to hear the end of this as long as she lived. She dressed quickly, suddenly wishing that her flowered dress had a much, much higher neckline and grabbed her coat; some leather thing that had mystically appeared in her closet after a visit from the boys the week before.

Bella’s intent was to disappear out the back door before anyone could realize she was gone. She wasn’t counting on Kili leaning casually against the wall outside her dressing room with a smirk on his face.

“Should have used the window.” He sang, snagging her hand before she could slam the door of the dressing room in his face and do just that. “Tell me, Bell, why did my uncle stumble out of your room looking like a very tall tomato?”

“I’m sure I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Bella hissed. And if Thorin knew what was good for him, he wouldn’t know either.

“Pity.” Kili said, “He could use something good happening to him, what with the strikes in the mine and all.”

“Are they actually happening?” She asked, “I thought that it was just a rumor.” At Kili’s raised eyebrows she shrugged, “I heard your mother talking to that bald man with all the tattoos... Dwalin?”

“Dwalin.” Kili agreed. “Yeah, they started yesterday. Uncle has been in a right mood. Though funnily enough he didn’t look quite so angry leaving your room...” He trailed off.

Bella groaned. “Just keep your mouth shut.” She ordered. "Nothing happened."

Kili mimed pulling a zipper across his lips.

Bella wasn’t horribly reassured.

* * *

****  
  


Fili and Kili weren’t entirely correct when they assumed that they were Bella’s only friends in Erebor. In fact, they weren’t correct at all.

It’s just that her other friends didn’t exactly live in the part of town that Fili, Kili, or even Dís would want her going without an armed escort.

The part of town that was directly affected by the strike in Thorin’s mine.

She met Bard by chance, walking home from the studio late one night. Someone, she still didn’t know who, had followed her. And just when Bella was starting to panic Bard had appeared out of nowhere and looped his arm with hers.

“Hello, dear.” He had said, “Sorry I’m late.”

Bella had opened her mouth to tell him to bugger off when she noticed him nodding his head pointedly behind them and got it, “No problem, darling.” She had choked out.

He’d walked her all the way home, just in case.

And with Bard came his three children, Bain, Sigrid, and Tilda who all took an immediate shine to Bella and vice versa.

Obviously she was going to help them as much as she could.

The tote bags of groceries on Bella’s shoulders were as heavy as the world as she leant down to press a five dollar bill into a little girl’s hand. The child grinned a gap toothed grin before scampering off.

Bella shook her head, tilting her head back as the first raindrop landed on her nose, followed by another, and another, until the whole sky seemed to open up upon her.

By the time she reached Bard’s apartment building she was soaked through. She ducked under the first floor awning and set down one of the bags in front of door 108, knocking twice and heading for the stairs knowing damn well that Bifur wouldn't open the door until Bella was long gone.

Bard lived on the third floor and the stairs were nearly Bella’s end, weighed down with groceries as she was. But Tilda, Bard’s youngest, ripped open the door as soon as Bella knocked and attacked her with a tight hug around her waist.

“Bella’s here!” Tilda called and on cue Bain emerged from his room and Sigrid from the kitchen.

Bella smiled, “I brought groceries.” She held up the bag.

Sigrid blew out a huff of air and nudged her sister out of the way to hug Bella herself. “You’re a saint.”

Bella laughed, “No. Just someone who can’t stand the thought of children going hungry. Would you like some help cooking? I have to be at the Durin’s in a couple of hours but to be honest I’m not looking forward to that and would love a distraction.”

“I would love help with dinner.” Sigrid grinned, reaching over and snagging her brother by the back of his shirt as he tried to sneak by. “But I think he needs help with his English homework more, if you don’t mind.”

Bain groaned, “Sigriiiiid!”

Bella laughed and held out a hand, “Come on, Bain. I’ll show you the trick they teach you in college that they don’t in middle school.”

That got Bain’s attention and he threaded his little fingers through Bella’s -which were also little, to be honest. “What? There’s a trick?”

“There are many tricks, young Padawan.” Bella assured him, using his hand to tug him over to the dining room table where all of his books were spread out. “Especially with ‘Effect’ and Affect."

“I can never tell which one to use..." Bain mumbled.

“I know," Bella said, “and that’s why I’m going to tell you how to remember... “Effect’ is the end result. E for E. ‘Affect’ is the action. A for A."

Bain froze. “You just changed my _life,_ Bella."

Bella got all of Bain’s homework done, helped Tilda sew up one of her stuffed animals, and managed to work with Sigrid to get dinner on the table just as Bard walked through the door. He took one look around and then kissed all of his children hello before moving on to Billa and wrapping her in a hug.

“What would we do without you?” He asked.

Bella laughed him off, reaching for her coat. “You’d manage.” She assured him. “But I stayed longer than I should have. Dís will murder me if I’m late.”

“You earned an invite to the shindig tonight?” Bard asked, stripping off his coat as Bella shrugged hers on.

“Apparently.” Bella rolled her eyes, “I’d pretend to be sick but I have to give Thorin his coat back.”

“You have _Thorin Oakensheild’s_ coat? How did that happen? That asshole wouldn't give it away willingly if you were freezing to death.” Bard’s eyebrows rose.

“Do _not_ ask...” Bella sighed, “And he’s not that bad. He has his moments.”

“ _Not that bad_?” Bard asked incredulously, “Have you been wearing a blindfold and earplugs since you moved here?”

“No, I have not.” Bella shrugged, “I’ve seen him while he wasn’t at work. He’s not a bad person, Bard. He’s a little...something. But he’s not not bad. Don’t give up on him.” She advised, peering out the window, “Is it still raining?”

Bard’s already troubled expression dropped further, “Did you walk here?”

“I did.” Bella pursed her lips; it was still pouring.

Sigrid appeared at Bella’s side before her father could so much as open his mouth again, pushing a bright pink _Hello Kitty_ umbrella into her hands. “It was Tilda’s,” she explained, “before she decided she was too old for such silly things.”

Bard grinned, wrapping an arm around his oldest child’s shoulders, “Such a good girl.” He pressed a kiss to the top of her hair, “It’s silly,” he said to Bella, “but it will keep you dry. You and your blindfold.”

Bella rolled her eyes despite the fact that her own smile so wide it almost hurt her face, “Thank you.” She made her way to the door, “I’ll see you tomorrow, then?”

“Definitely.” Sigrid agreed.

“Bain,” Bella called, “I expect to see at least an eighty on that test.”

“Yes Ma’am!” Bain yelled back.

* * *

Fili and Kili were waiting inside Bella’s apartment when she got there and somehow she wasn’t even surprised anymore.

“Where have you _been?”_ Kili hissed, “And what is happening with your hair?”

“I was at a friends.” Bella rolled her eyes, setting the umbrella carefully in the corner by the door and slipping off her shoes. “And it got wet, Kili. That’s what happens when it rains.”

“Nevermind.” Fili snapped, “We have less than an hour to get you ready to go.” Suddenly there was fabric flying at her face. “Put that on. Don’t argue and don’t worry about your hair and makeup.”

Kili already had a brush in his hand, a determined expression on his face, and Bella wondered how this became her life.

“You know,” she told them as she stomped into the bathroom, barely resisting the urge to slam the door behind her, “I can dress myself, contrary to popular belief. I’ve been doing it since I was two. That’s almost twenty eight years.”

“Did you hear something, Kee?” Fili asked loudly and Bella bit her lip to hold in a scream.

The fabric Fili had thrown at her was the sweater dress Prim had given her and it did nothing to improve Bella’s foul mood. It was short, barely coming down to mid thigh, and Bella felt exposed. Way more exposed than she wanted to be in the presence of Thorin Oakenshield who had already seen far too much of her.

At least the boys stuck to what she was comfortable with regarding her hair and make up. All Kili did was braid the front across the top of her head like a headband and run a flat iron (that she knows she didn’t buy for herself) over her curls a couple of times to loosen them up.

Fili came at her with multiple powders and brushes but when he was done Bella could hardly tell if she was wearing anything.

She felt her her annoyance dissipate. They were good boys.

Then Fili brought out the shoes; five inch high taupe things. “You expect me to handle tonight wearing stilts?”

“Yes.” Fili and Kili said together.

Bella thought of arguing but figured it wouldn't get her anywhere anyways. “Fine, but you’re holding me up all night.” She told them.

They agreed easily and ushered her out the door.

The Durin’s annual Christmas party served to remind Bella how far away from home she really was. It was the first weekend of December and Bella hadn’t even unpacked her box of decorations yet.

“That coat looks a little too big for you.” Someone mumbled to Bella’s right and she jumped in surprise at the realization that Thrain had come up beside her at some point while she’d been admiring Dís’ Christmas tree.

Bella looked down to Thorin’s coat, folded over her crossed arms. “It’s much too big on me.” She agreed, “I’ve been looking for Mr. Oakenshield since I got here to return it but I can’t seem to find him.”

“He’s mingling.” Thrain said, all at once disgusted and proud of his son. “And also,” his lips twitched upwards, “I believe he’s hiding from the other members of your company.”

“Really?” Bella’s eyebrows rose, “Whatever for?”

“My son is quite a catch, Miss. Baggins.” Thrain said stiffly. “All the women in Erebor are chasing after him.”

“Oh, not all of them, surely.” Bella’s already small burst of laughter died out nearly instantly as Thrain turned a dirty look upon her, “Or, maybe they are.”

Thrain sniffed, “If you had a son such as mine, Miss. Baggins, you’d be proud too.”

“Oh, I’m sure I would be.” Bella agreed easily, “My nephew got weaned off formula last week and I’ve told just about everyone.” And oh, Bella had it so bad for little baby Frodo. Prim sent her pictures by the dozens and every single one of them got saved to Bella’s phone in the little album specifically for the lad. “And he’s not even my child.” Or her nephew, but Prim had decided that since Bella was Frodo’s godmother she got the title of Aunt.

Bella rather liked it.

“Who’s not your child?”

Bella jumped again, and would have toppled over in her ridiculous shoes had a large hand not grabbed onto her shoulder to keep her upright. “Mr. Oakenshield!” She gasped, pressing a hand to her chest over her rapidly beating heart, “You can’t just sneak up on people like that!”

“Terribly sorry, Miss. Baggins.” Thorin said, releasing Bella’s shoulder and taking a step back. “I didn’t mean to frighten you.”

Bella nodded, floundering for a moment at how good he looked in a suit. Yavanna help her that jacket looked fit to burst at the slightest flex of his shoulders. “I uh...” She finally seemed to get her brain back into her head; that was Thorin Oakenshield, who was an ass at the best of times and who had seen her very nearly naked three months prior (and who had avoided her like the plague ever since), “I wanted to return your jacket.” She held out the garment, having had it washed and pressed. “It’s been hanging in my closet for months, but I haven’t seen you to give it back.”

Thorin’s fingers dragged across Bella’s skin as he took the jacket with a smile of thanks, even as his ears pinked with the memory of how she came to _possess_ that jacket. “Thank you, Miss Baggins.”

“I think at this point you may a well just call me Bella.” She said, though it very nearly physically pained her to say. She had quite enjoyed having the last word in that particular argument and Fili and Kili still looked at her like she hung the moon and brought it up every chance they got. “Just kindly don’t go and pick up different nicknames.” She added dryly, “Fili and Kili heard my cousin call me Little Bunny on Skype last week and they haven’t used my actual name since.”

“Then I’m going to have to insist you use my first name, as well.” Thorin said, and he really could be charming when it suited him.

“Oh, I do.” Bella said with a smile.

“When?” He asked.

“When you leave the room of course!” Her smile widened into a grin as her response earned a surprised snort of laughter from Thrain.

“I may learn to like you, Miss. Baggins. Poor taste in men notwithstanding.” He said, patting her arm almost fondly as he stepped away from her, “Thorin, I expect you’ll actually be at dinner this year?”

“This is Dís’ party, Adad.” Thorin reminded Thrain, “But if it will keep you from terrorizing the villagers I will be there.”

Was that a joke? Did _Thorin Oakenshield,_ king of the frown, actually make a joke? “Do you normally skip out on dinner?” Bella asked, still a little flabbergasted.

“Wouldn’t you?” Thorin asked back. “Stuck in a room with your whole family and all of their friends?”

Bella’s face fell. “Normally, Mr. Oak- Thorin,” she cleared her throat, “Normally, I would say yes. But this year is the first year I have not had that and I miss it dearly, truth be told.” Christmas in the Shire was an affair, to say the least. All of Hobbiton got into the holiday spirit but none so much as the folks in Bella’s little corner. “In the Shire everyone knows everyone. It’s the most cliche, Hallmark movie rubbish except it’s real. And at Christmas time everything is so nice; it’s done up with fairy lights and there’s a huge tree in the middle of town that the little ones decorate with ornaments they make in school...” Bella swallowed harshly against the lump in her throat, “and then on Christmas Eve everyone gets together. The Brandybucks, the Tooks, the Baggins, the Gamgees, and we all bring in Christmas day together.”

“That sounds lovely.” Thorin’s voice was a little rough. “Erebor must seem frigid in comparison.”

Dís’ laughter rang through the house and Bella looked up from her hands in time to see Fili, Kili, and their friends Ori and Gimli ducking under each other in their attempt to wrap her completely in three different strands of tinsel.

To her left Dwalin and his brother Balin were attempting to stop Ori’s eldest brother Dori from storming over and stopping all the fun while their middle brother, Nori, picked Dwalin’s pocket, probably just to prove that he could.

Gimli’s father Gloin and his brother Oin had pulled Thrain over to watch from the relative safety of the staircase.

It made something warm and fond bubble to life in Bella’s stomach as she answered, “Well, it’s not quite so horrible.”

Dinner was almost as big of a debacle as it would have been back home; whole turkeys, hams that must have weighed fifteen pounds each, bowls and bowls of mashed potatoes, stuffing, cranberry sauce, and more pies than Bella could count on both hands.

“I wish you would have told me how much food there needed to be.” She told Dís, as Fili and Kili tried to usher her into a seat between them, “I would have helped.”

“I would have asked if I needed it.” Dís assured her, “But thank you all the same, Bella.”

“Bunny,” Kili whined, “you have to sit with us.”

“Oh, I do, do I?” Bella asked, her lips quirking into an amused smile, “Says who?”

“Says us.” Fili declared. “And since we’re the people making sure that you don’t fall over in those ridiculous shoes of yours...”

“They’re _your_ shoes!” Bella squawked indignantly, _“You_ brought these horrid things into my apartment and wouldn't let me wear my own damn shoes!”

“He said, she said...” Kili shrugged.

“Bella, are my nephews giving you trouble?” Thorin appeared at Bella’s side again, having wandered off to talk with his father shortly after Bella’s description of Christmas in the Shire.

“Besides conspiring to put me in stilts so I can’t run away from them?” Bella asked with a short laugh, “Not at all.”

“We never give her trouble.” Fili mumbled, “Bunny loves us.”

“I don’t love when you call me ‘Bunny’.” Bella hissed.

“I could always take them off your hands.” Thorin offered, an easy grin that Bella had never seen before on his face. It was a good look for him; it made him look younger. Less like an asshole.

“Are you going to lock them in a closet?” Bella asked innocently.

“Perhaps trade them for a handful of magic beans...”

“I’m offended.” Kili said loudly. “Are you offended?” He looked at his brother.

Fili scowled. “Very.”

Bella giggled. “Oh dear.”

“Perhaps then, I will just take her off your hands?” Thorin teased his nephews, holding out a hand for Bella to take. “If the lady so chooses.”

Oh dear. Did he want her to take his hand? Or was he just offering in the spirit of teasing his nephews? Did he want to spend time with her? Bella couldn’t read what he was thinking on his face.

“It’s okay.” She finally said, deciding she had better stay with people she knew enjoyed her company, “Like they said, they’re the people making sure I don’t fall over.”

Thorin withdrew his hand with what looked like a flash of disappointment. “Of course.” He said, inclining his head, “I’ll see you after dinner than, Miss. Baggins.”

“It’s Bella.” She reminded him, “And you’ll see me at dinner, don’t be so dramatic.”

She ended up wedged between Fili and Kili, one seat shy of directly in front of Thorin. Not that she bothered trying to talk to him, or anyone, really. It was far too loud and the stories she heard were far too entertaining.

“So, these stupid little shits,” Dwalin said loudly, motioning to Fili and Kili who didn’t even have the grace to look sheepish, “think it’s a great plan to get inside the damned barrels and go for a ride in the river.”

“You did not!” Bella gasped, turning to Fili and Kili in turn and then slapping them both. Wonderful idiots.

“They did, Lass!” Dwalin flailed a hand to Thorin, “Then this equally stupid fucker gets in another barrel and goes after them!”

Bella couldn’t hold in her giggles, covering her face with her hands and laughing until her stomach hurt and there were tears dripping from her eyes, only laughing harder when Dwalin proclaimed “I have pictures!” and passed his phone across the table to her. The pictures were blurry, the way that pictures were when the subject was moving, but there was no mistaking her boys, laughing and obviously having the time of their lives even while being pursued by a positively murderous Thorin.

She looked up, daring to meet Thorin’s eyes, and was pleasantly surprised to notice that he was smiling at her even as she laughed at him. “If I am a bunny,” She said mostly to Fili and Kili but loud enough for Thorin and, of course, Dís to hear, “then your uncle is definitely a very angry cat.” She sipped at the drink Kili had made her; cranberry juice and what tasted like Rum, gazing at Thorin over her glass to gauge his reaction.

“Uncle is grumpy cat!” Fili crowed like it was Christmas day right then and not nearly a month away.

“Uncle is _totally_ grumpy cat!” Kili agreed.

Thorin leveled a wry look upon Bella, his lips twisting up like he was trying to tell her _“Do you see what you have started?_ ” without ever opening his mouth.

“Speaking of Thorin,” Thrain spoke up, “any talk of the strike ending?”

Thorin deflated, his expression darkening. “No. They are stubborn in this it seems. I have heard nothing from them except for the usual demands for more money or less hours.”

Thrain hummed thoughtfully, “Miss. Baggins, you are friends with a few of the workers, have they said anything to you?”

Bella’s heart beat rapidly at being put on the spot and she swallowed the bite of mashed potatoes she’d just put in her mouth so quickly she nearly choked, “No.” She rasped, clearing her throat, “No, they haven’t spoken of the strike at all.”

“What do you talk about?” Thrain pressed on and Bella cursed him inwardly.

“I didn’t know that you knew any of my employees.” Thorin said, looking almost betrayed.

“I’m friends with quite a few of them.” Bella addressed Thorin, “And we speak of everything else. Music, movies, the weather, Hobbiton, Erebor, food,” her lips quirked up, “and I often help the children with their homework.”

“You left a bag of groceries outside of Bofur and Bombur's house this afternoon, did you not?” Thrain asked and really Bella didn’t see how it was any of his business.

“I did.” Bella nodded, “Then I went to Bard’s and I helped his son with his homework, taught his daughter how to make her own pasta, and then was sent home with a _Hello Kitty_ umbrella.” She narrowed her eyes and jutted her chin outwards, the very picture of defiance. “I also left bags of groceries for a couple other families. Is that a _crime_ Mr. Oakenshield? To feed children?”

“They know how to feed their children.” Thrain shot back, “Go back to work.”

“Surely you don’t agree with the strike, Bella.” Ori said from his place between his brothers, his voice hushed and awed.

“Well, no,” Bella admitted, “but also yes.” She paused as every eye around her widened, “It’s important to see both sides of every question, isn’t it?”

“You’re doing more harm than good by buying them groceries.” Thorin said softly.

“Really?” Bella tilted her head curiously, “Because no matter what way I look at it I see no harm in giving hungry children food. Have you met Bard’s children? What about Bombur’s? He has eight of them, you know.”

Thorin was silent for a long moment, “I didn’t know.” He finally admitted, “I’ve only met his oldest daughter.”

“Bridget.” Bella said quietly, “Her name is Bridget. She’s sixteen and she loves to bake. She makes the best chocolate cupcakes I’ve ever had.”

“It’s none of my business what they do in their own time, Bella.” Thorin frowned, “I’m not their father nor their brother. I’m their boss.”

Bella made a frustrated noise in the back of her throat but Dís, thankfully, saved her brother from getting a spoonful of mashed potatoes flung at him, as was the tradition with difficult friends in the Shire, “What she’s saying, Thorin,” Dís said softly, “is not that you should be their father or brother, but that you should maybe try to balance being their boss with being their friend.”

Bella’s shoulders relaxed as she nodded. Under the table, both boys grabbed one of her hands and squeezed. Bella squeezed back; they were such good boys. She maybe loved them a little bit.

Slowly but surely everything got loud again, everyone having gone completely silent during Bella and the Oakenshields’ discussion. The louder the room got the more Bella relaxed until she found herself laughing as Gloin recounted Gimli’s latest E.R visit with Tauriel’s cousin Legolas.

“An arrow through the foot.” Bella mumbled to Kili, “I know you and Tauriel like archery as well, promise me you’ll be more careful than your cousins.”

Kili tightened his grip on her fingers, “I promise.”

 

Bella stayed through dessert, though only because the pleading looks from Fili and Kili and the reassuring smiles from Dís kept her rooted to her seat.

“Do you know any good Christmas songs?” Kili asked, as soon as Bella had finished her pie.

She looked over, eyes widening and her index finger still in her mouth from where she’d used it to swipe up the last of the whipped cream on her plate. “Hm?” She pulled the finger from her mouth with a pop. “What? Christmas songs? I know quite a few....”

“Anything we may not have heard?” Fili piped from from Billa’s other side.

“I... don’t think so? I mean, they’re all pretty standard. The only one I can think of is Il Est Ne.”

“Never heard of it.” Kili’s grin was as bright as the sun as he turned to Dís, “Mum, Bella knows a song we don’t!”

Dís’ eyebrows rose. “Does she now?”

“I suppose I do.” Bella shrugged a little bashfully. “ _Il Est Ne_. It’s half in French.”

“I think I heard it once.” Thorin said, “It’s very catchy.”

“Will you teach it to us, Bunny?” Kili asked, “If Uncle says it’s catchy it must be.”

And that’s how Bella ended up standing at the piano with a group of people she didn’t know crowded around her while she taught them all to sing in French.

Well, kind of sing in French. None of them were on key and Thorin wasn’t even singing as Balin plucked along at the piano.

Bella looked up at him (and up, and up), “I thought you liked this song?” She whispered over the others’ caterwauling.

Thorin looked down at her, blue eyes a little cloudy with alcohol and a little something else left over from their discussion at dinner, and shrugged. “Maybe I just don’t feel like singing.”

“Is it about dinner?” She asked, winding her hands together in front of herself. “It was not my intention to upset you. I just... said what I believe.”

A large, warm hand wrapped around both of Bella’s. “I am not mad at you.” Thorin said softly, “I am a little angry at my father, though I don’t expect that to last.”

“I’m glad.” Bella smiled, looking down at their hands. “But for the record, I stand by what I said.” She carefully untangled their fingers and, with everyone thoroughly distracted at the piano, slipped away and out the back door, onto the porch.

The one thing she would say about Erebor was that despite all of it’s industrialism and technology, she could still see the stars.

Bella wasn’t expecting Thorin to follow her outside, shutting the door carefully behind him.

“You’re not wearing a jacket.” Was all he said.

No, she was not. And she was beginning to regret it a little as the cold attacked her bare legs mercilessly and began to seep through her sweater only moments later. It was a serious worry that if her toes went numb she would topple over in her high heels.

“But that’s not why you came out here.” Bella wrapped her arms around herself. “I came out here for fresh air, Thorin, not to fight with you.” She was so tired. Dís had been working them all extra hard for their televised production of The Nutcracker, Fili and Kili were very good at monopolizing her off time, and any free moment she had she was bringing as much relief as she could to those on strike.

She was exhausted.

“I don’t want to fight.” Thorin mumbled, and Yavanna almighty, he looked as tired as Bella felt.

“Are you sure? Because you seem to be awfully good at picking fights.”

“And you seem to be very good at arguing back.” Thorin pointed out, “But I guess that’s what happens when you live in the South; you get used to lazing about and having nothing better to do than argue about things of little consequence.”

“Excuse me?” Bella asked, her shoulders stiffening. “We may be a little more lax in our pursuit of competitive trade, Mr. Oakenshield,but there is much less suffering in all of Hobbiton than I’ve seen just in your mine in the five minutes I was unfortunate to be there.”

“From what I’ve seen of you, Miss. Baggins, you seem to have an unfair prejudice towards all of Erebor in the first goddamn place!” Thorin’s face was flushed, whether from the cold or from anger Bella wasn’t sure but she bet she looked about the same.

“I assure you that I have no problem with Erebor.” Bella hissed, “However, pompous mine owners who treat people however he likes just because he perceives himself as better than them -”

“ _I do not_.” Thorin interrupted.

“You do!” Bella argued, “You seem to forget, Mr. Oakenshield that just because you have had good luck does not mean that everyone else has!”

“Good luck?” Thorin nearly roared, “Good luck was it, when my grandfather, mother, and little brother died in an explosion in the mine when Frerin was just sixteen? Good luck when my father refused to go anywhere near the place and had to be committed for a year and a half because of the guilt? What about when I had to drop out of school and put every penny I had, and then some, into the godforsaken mines that broke apart my family just because there was no other option?” Thorin didn’t move for a moment, his fists clenched at his sides and his shoulders shaking as he tried to regain control of himself, staring down Bella who was trembling herself with the force of his anger. “Is that the good luck you were referring to?”

Bella opened her mouth to say something, anything, but no noise came out. And it wouldn't have mattered if it did anyway, she doubted Thorin would hear her, lost in his own head as he was.

And then a moment later he was turning and stomping back into his sister’s house, the door swinging shut behind him with a slam.

It took a few deep, calming breaths before Bella was able to follow him, and even then she avoided the room where everyone was still singing loudly, cheerfully, completely oblivious that Bella and Thorin had just had an outright row on the patio.

Another outright row.

Her coat was hanging in the hall closet, the silly green coat she loved so much looked so bright and out of place next to the blacks and the greys hanging around it. “That’s a truly depressing thought.” She mumbled as she slipped it over her shoulders, “I’m identifying with my coat.”

“Miss. Bella?” Ori asked, peeking around the corner. “Are you leaving already?”

Bella forced herself to smile for the youngest Ri brother’s sake, “I am, I’m afraid. Tell everyone I said goodbye, would you?”

Ori nodded, padding closer on bare feet, his shoes having been discarded along with Fili and Kili’s when the decorating began, “Are you alright?” He asked, brow furrowing, “You’re all red.”

“It’s very cold outside.” Bella reminded him, “I stepped out for some air in naught but my sweater.”

Ori looked horrified, “You’ll catch your death!”

“That’s what they keep telling me.” Bella responded wryly, reaching out and catching Ori’s hand, “I’m fine. Tell them I said good night?”

“Of course.” And without further ado the tiny Ri leant forward and pressed a smacking kiss to her cheek, “Thank you, for what you’re doing for Bombur and his family.” He said quietly, “Don’t let anyone else tell you it’s a bad thing. It’s good, Miss. Bella. It’s really, really good.”

Bella nearly wept with gratitude, reaching out and pulling Ori into a tight hug, standing on her tiptoes to hook her chin over his shoulder. “ _Thank you._ ” she whispered.

Ori didn’t say anything, but he did hug her back just as tightly, if not tighter, than she had hugged him.

When Bella pulled back she had to wipe at her eyes; her fingers came back smudged black and she figured it was a good thing she was leaving. Smudged eyeliner was the bane of Fili’s existence and she didn’t think she trusted him that close to her eye with a brush considering how much alcohol he’d consumed.

“Are you alright to drive?” Ori asked as Bella fished her keys from her coat pocket, hooking the little ballerina charm around her index finger.

“I only had the one drink, and that was before dessert, singing, and... outside.”

“Outside?” Ori asked curiously.

Bella shook her head and headed for the door, “Goodnight, Ori.”

“Goodnight, Miss. Bella.”

When she got home Bella unpacked her decorations and googled ‘Blue Mountain Mine Explosion’. She played the news story while she built her Christmas tree.

It had been exactly as Thorin said; an accidental flame in the mine had combusted the methane gas. Three hundred people had died in the blast, including Frís , Thror, and Frerin Oakenshield.

Bella’s heart clenched; Thorin’s brother had only been fifteen.

 

* * *

 

“You and Thorin are fighting again." Dís said offhandedly during Bella’s costume fitting for The Nutcracker; the one time Bella couldn’t make an excuse and run away without becoming a living voodoo doll from all of the pins Fili was holding her clothes on with.

“Were we ever not?" Bella asked dryly, holding her hair up and out of the way as Fili circled around her to check that the back was fitting well for the seventy fourth time that half hour. "I’m pretty sure that if you put your brother in a room with me, Hitler, Satan, and two bullets he’d shoot me _twice."_

Fili coughed a cough that sounded suspiciously like a laugh.

Dís shot him a glare and continued, “True enough, but this time it’s bothering you."

“This time it was my fault." Well, maybe not entirely, _“Mostly._ It was mostly my fault."

“I was about to say,” Dís smiled, “I know my brother well enough to know that he was at least somewhat to blame."

“He claims to not wish to fight but then says such stupid things." Bella mumbled.

“Is this still about feeding the children?” Fili asked,"Because don’t tell uncle but I agree with you here."

“We all agree with you." Dís added, “Even Thorin would, I think, if he were thinking for himself."

Bella’s eyebrows rose, “Is this an ‘Invasion of The Body Snatchers’ kind of thing here? Do I need to make a hat out of tinfoil?"

Mother and son burst out laughing, Fili very nearly sticking Bella in the backside with a pin he was trying to secure.

“May as well be.” Dís said, smile turning wry and a little sad, “But what I meant was that Thorin has spent a very long time trying to become our grandfather through the guidance of our father. Which has, unfortunately, lead to Thorin turning more into a mini-Thrain than anything else. I love my father dearly, Bell, but you must understand that a good many of his opinions are vastly outdated."

Bella hummed thoughtfully, “So, you’re saying that your brother is an asshole because your father is putting ideas in his head and words in his mouth?"

Dís snorted, “Well, my brother is an asshole all on his own. He needs no help there, I’m afraid." Fili muttered his assent, “Which is why the fact that my father is indeed putting ideas in his head and words in his mouth is so unsettling."

“It’s turning him from a regular garden variety asshole to the king of the assholes.” Fili explained, pinching a couple of pins between his teeth for safe keeping.

“Yes, I understood your mother fine, Fili. You just wanted to say garden variety asshole, didn't you?"

“Basically yes." Fili mumbled around his pins, grinning sharply, “I’m so glad you came ‘round today.” He bent down to inspect the hem of her dress.

“I am too.” Bella admitted, “It seems I’m no longer accustomed to lounging around my apartment all day, between you and your hooligan brother and the strike.”

“Kili will be so pleased that you’re calling him a hooligan.” Dís said dryly.

“I’m sure he will.”

“Dís! Have you-” Thorin stopped in his tracks upon seeing Bella standing there in naught but a corset and underskirt, no doubt remembering the last time they’d been in the same position. “Miss. Baggins.” He said stiffly, “I did not realize you were here.” There was something in his face almost like apprehension. “And Fili as well. I fear that everything just got a lot more complicated.”

“What are you talking about?” Dís asked sharply while Fili crowded in close to Bella.

“I don’t like the look on his face.” Fili whispered, “Something happened.”

“Miss. Baggins has visited us at a most inopportune time.” Thorin said and for the first time Bella heard the yelling.

“They’re rioting?” Bella hissed, stepping off the step Fili had her stand on and holding up her skirts as she moved to the window. Her breath caught; “Bard...” She whispered, her eyes locking on her friend’s face.

“Yes,” Thorin said angrily, “your best friend seems to be the frontrunner.”

Bella shook her head mutely, pressing her lips together. “Damn it.” she swore, turning on her heel and heading for the door. “What are they doing, coming to the studio.” She muttered under her breath, “I’m going to kick his ass.”

“Bella!” Fili started for her, “Bunny, what are you doing?”

“I am going to tell Bard exactly how stupid he is is what I’m doing.”

Thorin’s hand -and Bella was very pointedly not thinking about how she knew that it was Thorin’s hand even without looking- closed around her wrist tightly, “Belladonna, do not.” He hissed, and Bella had a moment of wonder that he knew her full name before the indignant anger kicked in.

“Let go of me right now, Thorin Oakenshield.” She hissed, wrenching her wrist away and throwing open the door.

Fili and Dís’ shouting followed her down the stairs until she stepped outside and it was overpowered by the shouting of a hundred angry, out of work miners.

They quieted, fractionally, when she stepped out the door, nearly naked in her corset and underskirt, and Bella had a short moment of bashful pride that the sight of her in her underthings was enough to quiet a mob before her ire made a comeback, “What are you doing?” She yelled, balling her hands into fists at her sides.

It was cold outside. So cold that as soon as she’d stepped out the door her whole body had broken into gooseflesh.

Bard’s mouth shut with a clap, “Bella?” He asked, dumbfounded as the rest of his coworkers raged next to him with the exceptions of Bifur, Bofur, and Bombur who had also silenced completely at Bella’s appearance.

“Who did you expect, _Minnie Mouse_?” Bella snapped, the cold doing nothing to lessen her wrath, “I am a member of Dís Durin’s dance company, which you well know, Bard Girion, why wouldn’t I be here?”

Bard opened his mouth but said nothing as Thorin appeared behind Bella’s left shoulder. “Miss. Baggins, please go inside. I’ll handle this.” Thorin hissed urgently into Bella’s ear.

“I will do no such thing.” Bella snapped, the crowd only got angrier with Thorin’s appearance and she swore inside her head. He wasn’t _helping._

Thorin’s hand curled upon her arm for the second time, “The police are coming, Bella, it is handled please go inside. My sister and Fili are worried sick about you.”

“You as well, I’ll bet.” Bella argued back, “They respect me more than they respect you, let me talk to them. You don’t need to get the police involved. Most of them have children, they cannot afford to spend the night in jail!”

Thorin was actively shoving Bella back towards the door, “I will try my best but please go inside where you are safe and warm. You’re barely wearing a thing and it’s under twenty degrees.”

Bella struggled against his hold, stubbornly refusing his plea. But the crowd was getting restless, Thorin and Bella were spending too much time focused on each other and not on them. Bella didn’t know who threw the rock, only saw the thing out of the corner of her eye once it was already airborne. Her intention was to get both herself and Thorin out of the way.

She only half succeeded.

As Bella crumpled in Thorin’s arms, a dead weight against his chest, stars danced in front of his vision. There was blood on Bella’s temple, and he heard Fili yelling out the window as if he was underwater; muffled and muggy.

Thorin looked up, face contorted in anger the likes of which most of his workers had never seen, not even on his worst days. “ _Are you happy?_ ” He shouted, “Now that you’ve hurt the person who campaigned for you and fed your children when you could not **_are you happy_**?”

He lowered himself to the ground, keeping Bella cradled close, not trusting his suddenly weak knees to support both their weight.

The doors flew open behind him, Dís and Fili stumbling out onto the stoop; his sister five-foot-two of righteous anger for her friend and Fili a tall, blonde comet of outright fury.

The police chose that moment to arrive, the crowd scattering until all who remained were the four Bella had befriended, all looking stricken and pale as Thorin shrugged off his own jacket, carefully, and wrapped it around Bella’s shoulders.

“Is she alright?” Bofur demanded, stepping forward.

“This was supposed to be peaceful.” Bombur looked likely to break down in tears, “No one was supposed to get hurt.”

Bifur hissed through his teeth, his hands working to sign something Thorin couldn’t understand but figured was probably something incredibly rude.

“I know who threw it.” Bard finally said, darkly, as the police stepped towards the group. “He will not get away with it.”

“Bella has done too much for us.” Bofur agreed.

Thorin looked up, away from Bella’s peaceful face -she could be sleeping if not for the blood-, and shook his head at the police. “Not these men.” He rasped, “They didn’t have anything to do with this.” He looked back down, “Fili, take Bella inside.”

“But uncle-”

“Take. Bella.” Thorin growled, “I have to deal with everything else, please just take her inside, put some ice on her head, and get the rest of her warm.” His fingers flexed at her bare arm, “She came out here in just this and we’re expecting snow.”

Fili stepped forward, slowly, and plucked Bella from Thorin’s arms, trying to jostle her as little as possible.

Thorin almost threw up at how tiny she looked in his nephew’s arms, her limbs hanging limp and her head lolling on his shoulder.

“Mum,” Fili whispered, “pull her hair out. She hates when it’s being pulled like this.”

Dís stepped forward silently, freeing Bella’s long sheath of hair from the constriction of Fili’s arm. “Take her inside.” She said, “I’m going to help your uncle.”

Fili nodded, pale and drawn as he headed for the door. Thorin reached out and caught his arm, careful not to jolt him and Bella, “She’s going to be fine, Little Lion.” He promised, leaning forward and pressing their foreheads together like he would when Fili and Kili were small.

“That’s a promise right?” Fili asked softly, “That’s your promise voice?”

“It is.” Thorin agreed. “I have to go and make sure no one arrests the people Bella cares for so she’s not in such a bad mood when she wakes up,” he spoke as though he was talking to a child and not a twenty-two year old who was almost as tall as he himself was, but Fili didn’t seem to mind, “so it’s your responsibility to care for her until I get back. Do not let her leave.” He stressed, “I’m going to bring a doctor back with me to look at her head.”

Fili nodded, determined. “Okay. I can do that.”

Bella woke up with a splitting headache and a mouth that felt as though she’d spent the last eight hours munching on cotton balls. Even the very idea of opening her eyes exhausted her but there were people talking extremely close to her extremely sore head.

She tried to say something not entirely pleasant to the culprits but what came out of her mouth was a noise somewhere between a whine and a groan.

“Bella?” The voice closest to her asked, and then a hand was smoothing through her hair. “Bella, are you awake?” She knew that voice.

“‘s Miss. Baggins to you.” She managed to mumble, forcing her eyes open and her head to the side so she could smile tiredly at Thorin. “What happened?”

“You were…” Thorin swallowed hard; he looked years older than the last time Bella had seen him seemingly moments ago. “You were hit in the head with a rock.”

Oh, now she remembered. “Who threw it?” She asked softly, pushing herself up with the held of Thorin who wrapped a bracing arm around her back. Something tumbled from her shoulders into her lap and after a moment of blinking blearily at it she realized it was Thorin’s jacket. Again.

“I don’t know.” Thorin admitted, “But Bard assured me he would take care of it.”

Bella nodded, “He’s a good guy.”

“He is.” Thorin agreed, “Which is why I offered him a promotion, granted he calls an end to the strike.” Bella’s eyes widened and she stared at him in awe as he continued, “Bombur, Bofur, and Bifur as well.”

“You…?” Bella breathed, her heart in her throat.

“It pays better, and the work isn’t quite as taxing. They’ll have more energy for their children at the end of the day.”

Relieved, grateful tears welled up in Bella’s eyes and she hurriedly wiped them away, “Ori will be pleased.” She whispered, “He was awfully worried about Bifur, Bombur, and Bofur.”

“Well, I’m glad the young one will feel better, but I have to confess that I did not do it for him.” Then Thorin got that look of someone who had said something they hadn’t meant to say. “The uh… the doctor has looked you over, he couldn’t stay, I’m afraid, but he has given you a clean bill of health. Though if you start vomiting or feeling dizzy you are to call me immediately.”

“Given we actually allow you to leave.” Dís commented dryly from her spot against the wall, “That was an extremely dumb thing you did, Bell. As soon as you’re feeling better I am going to kick your ass.”

It startled a laugh out of Bella, and maybe her mother had been onto something about laughter being a natural medicine because she started to feel a little better. “I expect nothing less.” She said.

“And we get to help.” Kili piped up, curled on the sofa across from Bella with his brother, “Only I get to give every single one of you and extra slap for not calling me.”

“It all happened very fast, Kee,” Bella said softly, “and none of us believed it would turn violent.”

Thorin made a low, disagreeing noise and for the first time Bella realized that his arm was still behind her, across her bare back. His shirt sleeves were rolled up and after she noticed that it was his skin against hers she couldn’t seem to un-notice it.

“Either way,” Kili grumbled, “someone hurt my _namaduh_ and there will be reckoning.”

“ _Namaduh_?” Bella asked, eyebrows furrowing. “What does that mean?”

“Sister.” Fili answered, looking back and forth between his brother and Bella with an absurdly fond expression, “In _Khuzdul_.”

“What is _Khuzdul?”_

“Erebor’s official language.” Thorin answered, eyes locked on his nephews. Dís looked upon the proceedings simply amused with everything, “No one uses it much anymore, and as such it is rarely mentioned. Almost like a secret.”

“Huh.” Bella thought on it for a moment, then decided she liked the title. “How do you say ‘brother’ then?”

Fili and Kili looked surprised, then absolutely ecstatic but it was Thorin who answered, _“Nadad”_ .

 _“Nadad.”_ Bella repeated softly, smiling as it rolled off her tongue.

That set off noises of outright delight from Fili and Kili that seemed to clear the air of whatever heavy, acrid thing had had settled there after Bella’s injury.

“I hope you know that this means you’re never going to get rid of them.” Dís warned after they’d calmed down enough for her to be heard.

“Then it’s a very good thing I don’t want to.” Bella had barely gotten the words out before both boys were piling on top of her, trying their best to be quiet, conscious of her head, but so excited that all attempts at volume control seemed to be in vain.

“Boys!” Thorin barked and they both backed up, looking chagrined.

“Sorry, Bunny.” They chorused and Bella found her energy returning fairly quickly.

“It’s alright, I’m feeling a lot better.” She assured them, swinging her feet over the edge of the sofa and finally breaking contact with Thorin. She pulled his jacket from her lap carefully and held it out, “Thank you, again. It would seem I am always taking your jacket from you.” She smiled a little bashfully.

“I don’t mind.” He said, his own smile appearing to match hers though he didn’t reach for the jacket. “And you should keep it until you get changed. It’s cold in here.”

“Well, hopefully Fili will be willing to get me out of this ridiculous thing now-ish.” Bella looked over pleadingly, “The only thing worse than a laced corset is a corset that hasn’t been fitted properly. There is bonning digging into my ribs and I’m paranoid that my chest is going to pop out. And there are approximately no people here who want to see that.”

Kili suddenly fell into a horrible coughing fit that Thorin decided to try and cure by throwing a pillow at his head.

Bella was used to it.

* * *

 

There were twelve seasons of _Murder She Wrote_ on Netflix, enough tea to get Bella through the apocalypse comfortably, and Dís had outright ordered her to stay away from the studio for a few days until she was sure she was feeling better (choosing to completely ignore the fact that Bella was sure that she was feeling better two hours after waking up).

In college Bella learned that men thought when a woman said that she was going to hang around and do nothing that meant that she was going to wear boxer shorts and a tank top and no panties. What they didn’t understand was that that was completely bullshit.

When Bella hung around her house and did nothing she wore her baggiest pair of sweats, an old T-shirt, her most comfortable pair of panties -which, unfortunately happened to be the panda pair that Thorin had seen her in- with her hair in a ponytail and her glasses perched on her nose because she simply could not be bothered to brush her hair and put in her contacts.

She was most of the way through the episode where Rue MccLanahan and Larry Linville were married when there was a knock on her door.

Bella scowled and set her pint of ice cream on her coffee table before padding, barefoot, to the door. She wasn’t supposed to have company, especially not when Blanche Devereaux was married to Frank Burns and someone had a screwdriver jammed in his neck,  “Boys, I told you that I would hit you if you- Oh!” It was Thorin behind the door, not Fili or Kili. “Thorin. I was expecting-”

“Fili and Kili told me that you banned them from checking up on you today.” The tips of his ears turned pink and he refused to meet Bella’s eyes, “They seem to be under the impression that you wouldn’t hit me.”

Bella was quiet for a moment, “And you...went along with that? Considering that we cannot seem to be in the same room for five minutes without screaming at one another?”

Thorin huffed a laugh out of his nose, “Believe me, Miss. Baggins, the screaming is still better than the whining.”

Bella would admit that he had a point. “You can come in, but I’m not putting on a bra or real pants.” She wandered back over to the sofa, leaving the door open for Thorin to deal with.

“Where’s your bed?” Thorin asked, once he’d come further in. Bella pointed wordlessly to the ladder, plucking her ice cream off the coffee table and restarting her show. “Oh.” Thorin’s eyebrows furrowed at the music, “Are you watching _Murder She Wrote_?”

“Are you going to judge me for watching _Murder She Wrote_?” Bella asked defensively, “Because Kili got a shoe thrown at him for that yesterday.” And it was one of the stupidly high stilts that he and his brother liked to leave all over her apartment.

“It was not my intention.” Thorin mumbled, shifting from foot to foot awkwardly and Bella sighed before pausing her show again, for the second time in three minutes, her ice cream once again discarded on her table.

“Did you have some sort of actual reason for being here? Because if Fili and Kili just sent you to come see if I was okay… I obviously am.” Bella waved her hand for emphasis. “I am on my sofa, eating ice cream, and watching old T.V. which is exactly where they want me to be.”

Thorin opened and closed his mouth a few times, looking flustered and frustrated and a whole range of emotions Bella had never seen on his face before that moment. “While Fili and Kili are under the impression that you will not hit me they didn’t ask me to come. I am here of my own volition.”

Bella stood again, stepping forward until she was within a foot and a half of him, and cautiously asked, “Why?”

Thorin’s hand rose, and when Bella didn’t flinch away he pushed back the hair on the side of her face that had escaped her ponytail, his fingers brushing over the still bruised and sore skin of her temple, “I’m the reason you’re hurt.” He said.

Bella swallowed hard around the sudden lump in her throat, “Well, I am the one who ran out in front of an angry mob.”

“An angry mob that was angry at _me.”_ Thorin pointed out. “And the rock was also meant for me, you pushed me out of the way and we both know it.”

“It wasn’t my intention to take the blow _for_ you,” She said, “I just didn’t get out of the way in time.”

“Either way, this,” he touched her head again, “is my fault.”

“So you came here to what? Apologize?” Bella shook her head, “It’s not like I was forced into doing anything I did. I made my own choices and ended up getting hurt; it’s not the first time that has happened and it will not be the last, knowing myself as well as I do. It is no more your fault than it is the rock’s.”

Thorin’s expression was fairly astounded for the split second Bella saw it, and then he was leaning and and kissing her.

Thorin.

 _Kissing her_.

Her hands flew up to his shoulders, not grabbing on but not quite shoving him away either, just settling there and waiting it out. She didn’t close her eyes, they stayed wide and surprised even as Thorin pulled away.

“What was that?” She squeaked, her brain whirring a million miles a minutes while her stomach threatened to hit the ground. It was a little hard to breathe, her breath coming out it sharp, panicked gasps. “You kissed me!” She accused.

“I did.” Thorin’s eyebrows furrowed, “Should I have not?”

Bella just gaped at him. “You kissed me.” She repeated, “Holy crap, you just kissed me.” A pause, “ _Why did you kiss me?_ ”

“Because I wanted to.” Thorin cleared his throat, “I’m… bad with words.” He said, and yeah, no kidding, like Bella hadn’t noticed that particular trait fairly early on, “I didn’t just come here to apologize I… I wanted to tell you that I…”

Oh no. _Oh. No_.

“Oh no…” Bella whispered, finally meeting Thorin’s eyes, “Please do not say what I think you’re about to say. Please, _do not,_ Thorin.”

Thorin froze, “What?”

“Just… don’t.” Bella twisted her fingers in the hem of her T-shirt, “I don’t know why you’re doing this, and I don’t care to, especially if it happens to pertain to our… meeting after the show a few months ago or what happened the other day. I don’t need you to rescue my reputation and I don’t need you to apologize for my injury. So please just… don’t.”

“I don’t give a damn about your reputation, and though I am extremely sorry that you got hurt this has nothing to do with that.” His eyebrows had furrowed together, that usual, intense look back on his face, tinged with the anger that normally came whenever he and Bella spoke, “I’m trying to tell you that I love you.”

“You do not! You _cannot!”_ Bella waved her hands around her, “Just because I am far from home and alone does not mean that I need you to save me, Thorin. I do not want to be possessed and rescued, some damsel that you can take off the shelf and admire when you want to feel good about yourself!”

“I don’t want to possess you!” Thorin yelled, “I want you because I love you!”

“Well I don’t!” Bella shouted back, and though she immediately wished she hadn’t say it she couldn't take it back, nor could she stop herself, “Most of the time I don’t like you at all! You’re rude, and arrogant, and you have the worst temper I’ve ever bared witness to in my entire life!” Everything, every little gripe she’d ever had about Thorin Oakenshield came pouring from her mouth in one long gush, even the things that she no longer thought. And she couldn’t stop. And Thorin just took it, all of her ranting, even as tears landed on the wood floor and Bella’s voice started to crack.

He just stood there.

“I’m sorry.” Bella finally gasped, covering her mouth with one shaking hand.

“For what?” Thorin asked, his voice deceptively soft, “That you find my feelings for you offensive? Or for assuming that because I am a male who works in trade I either want to save you or own you?”

Bella took a deep, steadying breath, “I am bad at this…” She said, “I don’t know how to say no…”

“Oh, yes, because all of those marriage proposals you get must give you so much practice.” Thorin hissed.

“But you weren’t proposing marriage.”

Thorin looked at her then, and his face wasn’t upset, it wasn’t angry, it was completely indifferent. Cold. And it was the worst thing that Bella had ever seen in her life. “I might have been.”

Bella stood in that spot, the spot that Thorin had kissed her in, for a long while after that, wondering who had just broken who’s heart.

* * *

Dís didn’t mention it, and seemed to have ordered Fili and Kili to do the same, though that didn’t stop Kili from wandering over to Bella one day after rehearsal and whispering, “It’s okay, Namaduh , we picked you in the divorce.”

At that point, Bella didn’t even have the strength to be annoyed with him. She was just grateful that there was one thing in her life that was not going to have to change.

Thrain, however, had no such qualms with letting Bella know exactly who she had rejected. And Bella had taken it with grace, lecture after lecture, insult after insult, right up until he’d come into her little apartment.

And then she didn’t take it anymore.

“I’m afraid I used quite a few four letter words…” She admitted to Dís on the phone later. “I’m sorry to have angered your father.”

And then Dís finally brought it up. “You don’t know him… Thorin, I mean.”

“He doesn’t know me.” Bella said back. “He thinks he does, and I suppose I think I know him as well when neither of us even know ourselves let alone each other.” She laughed humorlessly, “We have made a mess of things, haven’t we?”

Life went on.

Bella danced in The Nutcracker, and fled to Hobbiton on the redeye the night of the last show for the mandatory two week break Dís had demanded every one of her dancers took.

Frodo, by then four months old, took to his Aunt Bell like a fish to water, latching onto her hair with his pudgy fists and cooing nonsense stories to her, which she nodded along to like she understood every word.

It was almost enough to allow her to forget the Thorin Thing, as she had taken to calling it in her head, and indeed she did feel a hundred pounds lighter by the time her two weeks were up and she returned to Erebor. (When in reality she was probably about seven pounds heavier).

For the most part she was able to continue on as usual, aside from the slowly darkening, deepening bags under her eyes.

_“But you weren’t proposing marriage.”_

_“I might have been.”_

The words haunted her, though for the life of her she couldn’t figure out why. Because he said that he loved her? The entire idea of that was ridiculous; Thorin Oakenshield in love with Bella Baggins? He had the mine, and his family, and the respect of just about everyone who was anyone across the country, and Bella was… a dancer. From a small town in the south.

Belladonna had always told Bella that love didn’t look at things like status and power, it looked at things like heartsongs and laughter.

But Bella had always been a sight more practical than her mother, and her practical side told her that there was no way, at all, that Thorin Oakenshield was in love with her. He may have been in love with his idea of her, of the small girl from out of town who needed someone to love and protect her. But as for the real Bella… well, Thorin had seen glimpses of her and every single time they had ended up shouting at each other.

Briefly, in the very back of her mind, Bella thought that Thorin himself, the Thorin who was not trying to be a ‘mini Thrain’ as his sister had put it, was actually rather lovely.

“Bella Baggins!” Gandalf Grey, a good friend of Belladonna’s before her death, boomed in his great, projecting voice from across the street.

Bella looked up, already most of the way through a smile before her eyes locked on the man standing to Gandalf’s right. Just like that, she had multiple places she needed to be that were far, far, away from right there. Like Jupiter.

Very pressing matters on the far side of Jupiter.

And that may not have even been far enough to escape the cold look in Thorin Oakenshield’s eyes as he looked at her.

“Gandalf,” She started apologetically but the old man wouldn’t hear any of it.

“Nonsense, I only want to take a moment of your time.” He beckoned her over and Bella reluctantly went on legs that were very suddenly made of lead. “You know Thorin Oakeshield, do you not?” He asked innocently, “Dís’ older brother?”

“We’ve met.” Thorin said stiffly, looking anywhere but at Bella now that she was close enough to count his eyelashes and the shades of blue in his iris’. He looked as tired as she felt.

And Yavanna was she exhausted. She was just so tired of everything. So tired of being tired.

“A couple of times.” Bella agreed, “How are you today, Mr. Oakenshield?” She asked, trying to be polite.

“I’ve been better.” Thorin replied, making a show of checking his watch. “But I really have to be going, it was nice seeing you, Mr. Grey.”

“And you, Thorin.” Gandalf smiled, oblivious to the tension between his two companions.

“Miss. Baggins.”

“Mr. Oakenshield.”

Bella watched Thorin go, almost positive that the jacket he wore was the one that had hung in her closet for all those months after the incident in the dressing room. Her fingers itched to reach out and touch the soft material, to straighten the crooked tie around his neck, to smooth down the crease between his eyebrows.

She had no idea where those thoughts came from, but she’d been having them more and more frequently the more his words played in her head.

_“You weren’t proposing marriage.”_

_“I might have been.”_

Bella had never wanted marriage. She had never wanted the white picket fence, husband, dog, two-point-five kids life. It had never shown up on her radar. She used to joke with Prim that she was missing the chip in her brain that made women lose their mind at the concept of marriage.

But hearing those words from Thorin -both in real life and the instant replay constantly going in her head- made her heart hurt.

“You look tired, my dear.” Gandalf commented, “Tired and very, very sad.”

“Well,” Bella sighed, “you’re not wrong.”

“Would you like to talk about it?” He asked, “It may make you feel better.”

“Oh, I very much doubt that, Mr. Grey.” Bella laughed softly.

Gandalf lay a large, soothing hand upon Bella’s shoulder, squeezing gently, “Alright.” He said, “But I did promise your mother that I would keep an eye on you, and I intend on doing just that. So please, if you’re having a hard time with anything at all, do not hesitate to come to me.”

“I won’t.” She promised, “But until then…”

“You want me to mind my own damn business and stop being so bloody facetious, am I right?” He asked, lips twitching upwards.

“Yes, exactly. Though I’m not sure I would have phrased it quite like that.”

“Oh, no. I don’t suppose you would; that’s exactly how your mother worded it and you have a little too much Bungo in you for that.”

“I take a good amount of pride in my ‘little too much Bungo’.” Bella scowled, suddenly defensive though she didn’t know what she was defending.

“I’m sure you do.” Gandalf pat her shoulder twice before moving away, “But I have to wonder if that ‘little too much Bungo’ is what put that frown on your face, dear.” His smile turned a little sad, “I do so miss those dimples. I remember when you were a child those things would get you out of even the deepest of trouble.”

“Like stealing carrots from the Gamgee’s garden.” Bella couldn’t help but laugh.

“Exactly like that.” Gandalf said, eyes twinkling at her. “Oh! I almost forgot, I spoke to Drogo this morning, Primula is sending he and Frodo down for a visit at the end of the week, he asked me to tell you since he never gets the chance, poor fellow.”

“At the end of the week?” Bella asked, blinking in surprise, “This week?” She had seen them not even a month ago.

“According to your cousin Prim is feeling rather poorly and could use the peace and quiet.”

Now Bella was worried, “Prim is sick?” She would have to make a call.

“Nothing too serious, I’m sure.” Gandalf assured her, “But yes, I am picking Drogo up from the airport on Friday afternoon. I figure I can just drop he and Frodo off at the studio. Would that be agreeable?”

“I… suppose?” Did she really have a choice?

As one would suspect rehearsal came to a sudden, grinding halt when Drogo showed up with a now five-month old Frodo on Friday afternoon. Bella herself dropped out of her stance and rushed the pair, throwing her arms around them both before pecking Drogo on the cheek and liberating Frodo from his father’s hold.

“Hi, Sunshine.” She whispered into his curly hair, “I missed you.” And oh, had she. With the Thorin Thing hanging over her and the fact that she suddenly felt just as out of place as she had when she first arrived in Erebor, Frodo and Drogo coming to visit was the best thing that could have happened to her.

Frodo cooed happily, throwing his chubby arms around her neck and resting his chin on her shoulder. “Ah!”

“He missed you too.” Drogo laughed, looking over Bella’s shoulder, “You must be Dís.”

“I am.” Dís confirmed, coming forward and resting a hand on the small of Bella’s back as she’d taken to doing since the Thorin Thing, like she was worried Bella would collapse under the weight of it all. “You must be her cousin, Drogo.”

“Guilty.” Drogo smiled.

“And this is Frodo.” Bella bounced him gently in her arms, like Dís somehow wouldn’t recognize him from the seven billion pictures Bella showed her almost daily. “He’s my sunshine.”

“I’m offended.” Fili announced from the top of the stairs, “Not only do we not get called when Frodo gets here, but then I get replaced by the little runt.”

Kili appeared next to his brother, none of Fili’s obviously mock grumpy ness upon his face as he flew down the stairs, holding out his arms to Bella with a hopeful expression, “Can I hold him?”

“Hey! I wanna hold him too.” Fili followed, “And I’m older so I get first choice.”

“I was here first!” Kili argued.

Bella just laughed, Frodo catching on and joining her, his little baby fists clapping excitedly as he cackled. “I think he’s quite enjoying being the center of attention.” She muttered to Dís and Drogo.

“I think you’re right.” Dís whispered back before clearing her throat, successfully shutting her sons up. “Actually, boys, I was here first and I am older than both of you.” She held out her arms, “I get to hold him.”

Frodo of course, being the lovely child he was, went straight to Dís with absolutely zero fuss…. and then refused to be held by anyone else for the next several hours, even taking his nap tucked safely against her side, one thumb in his mouth while his other hand gripped one of the various braids in Dís’s long dark hair to ensure that he wasn’t put down.

“I think I’ve just been replaced as favorite aunt.” Bella laughed over tea in Dís’ office.

“I don’t think I’ve earned that title.” Dís said, though she looked pleased nonetheless.

“Well that’s not up to you.” The tea in Bella’s hands was blueberry, the kind that Dís kept around specifically because Bella liked it, the mug was bright yellow and covered in roses -from the Beauty and The Beast collection-, and she even had a change of clothes in Dís’ office closet, just in case.

“You’d have to be Frodo’s great aunt.” Kili mused, “Since Bella is our sister now.”

Drogo’s eyebrows rose, “You went a picked up siblings and didn’t think to tell me?”

“I had to hear from Gandalf that you were even coming!” Bella exclaimed, “You haven’t had time to talk since I left!”

“We started calling you Sister before you left.” Fili pointed out. “You could have mentioned it while you were there.”

“You’re my least favorite brother right now.” Bella grumped, carefully ignoring  her cousin's triumphant crowing.

After tea came the job of getting Frodo and Drogo settled in, and as Bella suspected her little apartment was not the kind of place that was good for children; one room, really, plus the bathroom, with her bed up in the alcove. There wasn’t a lot of space for Frodo, just learning to walk, to toddle around in and what little there was had to be carefully baby-proofed with those cheap, multicolored pool noodles.

Everything breakable had to be picked up and moved to the higher shelves, all of her books as well if she wanted their pages intact, and she had to very meticulously hide her much loved, old, decrepit laptop, Spencer since the child seemed to have a radar for her computer.

And Frodo, obviously, couldn’t sleep in Bella’s bed with Drogo. So while her cousin took her bed -as he should, being a guest. Her mother raised her right after all- Bella spent her nights on her very comfortable sofa with a little, curly haired tot making himself at home across her chest.

Bella dreaded the day that they would leave her. They brought a little life to her apartment. She got to come home from the studio every day to Frodo’s bright smiles and whatever delicious something Drogo had whipped up.

And it led to her trying Froot Loops for the first time in her life and deciding that she quite liked them. Though, not as much as Frodo who barely seemed to want to eat anything else. He was never seen without a bowl of them hovering somewhere around his elbow.

Five days into the visit, however, Thorin Oakenshield appeared at Bella’s front door. There was music going inside, the kind of poppy, upbeat kind that Frodo liked, and air smelled like popcorn and butter; some of Bella’s favorite things, and she couldn’t quite wipe the delighted smile from her face.

Thorin looked like he had sucked on a lemon; “I’m sorry.” He said, that neutral, horrible expression making another appearance to haunt Bella’s dreams. “I didn’t know you had company.”

“I…” Bella looked behind her; Drogo was in the shower, having snatched the opportunity when Frodo had fallen asleep in the laundry basket, on top of Bella’s freshly washed clothes. “I have a minute.” She stepped forward, almost tripping over Drogo’s shoes as she went. “Silly, man,” she mumbled crossly, kicking them out of the way, “if I told him once I told him a thousand times…” She shut the door behind her. “I’m sorry.” She apologized, finally looking up with a bashful smile and tucking a loose hair behind her ear, “My apartment is kind of a mess right now.”

“I see.” Thorin’s eyes were on the ground, though he glanced up quickly when he felt her looking, “I just wanted to drop this off.” He held out a book. Bella recognized it; it was her copy of _Gone Girl_. She’d loaned it to Dís just before the Thorin Thing. “Dís has been meaning to, but she hasn’t gotten the chance this week.”

“Kili is sick.” Bella remembered, reaching out and taking the offered book, running her fingers over the raised print of the cover. “Did she like it?”

“Loved it.” Thorin rolled his eyes, the glimmer of his personality before she rejected him making Bella’s stomach warm.

She opened the front cover, the beginnings of a grin forming when she caught sight of the three signatures on the inside cover. Bella Baggins, in her own curly writing, Dís Durin in her friend’s more blocky writing, and then absolute chicken scratch- the only letters she could make out were a T and an O, both capitals. “And you?” She asked, peering up under her lashes. “This is your barely legible scrawl, right?”

Thorin sniffed; “I wasn’t going to sign it, but she made me.”

“Your sister is a scary woman.” Bella agreed, shifting from foot to foot, acutely aware of her mismatched socks as the cold of the cement underneath her feet bit into her skin, even through the fabric. Her sweater kept her warm enough, but her feet were freezing.

“The scariest.” Thorin nodded. He opened his mouth to speak again, though Bella hadn’t the foggiest idea what he would say but he never got the chance.

“Bella?” Drogo asked loudly from inside the apartment.

Bella swore; he was going to wake up Frodo with that racket. “Silly man!” She said again with more feeling. She rapped her knuckles on the door behind her gently, “I’ll be there in a moment; check on the cookies, would you?”

“Alright.” Drogo called back.

Still so loud!

“I’m going to actually murder him.” She said crossly, “Just you watch. He’s going to find himself on the wrong end of one of those ridiculous boots Fili dropped off on Tuesday.” Those thing were so tall she’d probably be able to see eye to eye with Thorin!

“I’m sure.” Thorin mumbled, and Bella was distressed to see that his expression had closed off again. “I’ll get out of your hair then,” He frowned, “your…. friend is obviously very impatient for your attention.”

“Oh, he’ll get over it.” Bella waved a hand, wondering briefly over the emphasis of the word ‘friend’, “How did you like the book?”

“It was fine.” Thorin said, “I’m not a large fan of switching point of views.”

Bella’s eyebrows rose, “You don’t say.” She mumbled dryly before choosing to let it go, “Even so, you have to be impressed with Amy.”

“That woman was a psychopath.”

“But a brilliant psychopath.” Bella laughed, her head snapping around as though she could see through her front door when a particularly ominous crash sounded. “What is he doing?” She hissed, more to herself than anyone.

When she turned back around to bid Thorin an apologetic goodbye, he was already halfway down the stairs.

He didn’t look back.

“Just when I think I have your uncle figured out,” Bella sighed to Fili later that night, curled in the big armchair nearest his window with a beer bottle hanging loosely from her fingers and his binder spread across her lap.

Fashion design wasn’t her speciality, but she figured she could read through his notes and ask him questions well enough. And besides, she was already there as his mannequin for his practical exam, for which he had to design a full outfit.

Bella was his favorite Barbie doll.

“You’ll never have him figured out.” Fili said, “No one does, except mum. And even she has a hard time.” When Bella sighed sadly he added, “Gimme a question.” To give her something to do.

She appreciated it.

“What is a… fashion house?” She asked, squinting her eyes to make out Fili’s handwriting; it was almost as bad as his uncle’s!

“High fashion designer.” Fili responded distractedly, a pin poking out the corner of his mouth, it was such a familiar gesture that it made Bella smile around her bottle, “Are you sure you don’t mind spending the evening away from your family?”

“Drogo is taking Frodo to see Frozen On Ice and I’m afraid that if I had to listen to Let It Go one more time this week I may have leapt from the audience and strangled whoever was unfortunate enough to play that stupid snowman.” Bella admitted, “It’s a cute movie, and I’m really glad that these kids have a positive role model in the media but I am absolutely tired of people telling me that I look like Anna.”

Fili looked away from the dress he was hemming to peer at her thoughtfully, then his eyes widened delightedly, “You do!” He gaped, the pin falling from his mouth as he laughed.

“Shut your mouth and tell me what a,” Bella frowned at the words, “pret-a-porter collection is?”

“Ready to wear.” Fili answered easily, “Hey, come here and try this on.”

Bella, clad in a pair of spanx and a tank top for just this reason, uncurled her limbs lazily, like a cat stretching, and wandered over to Fili’s work table. “How’s Kee doing?” She asked idly as Fili carefully tugged the dress over her head. Not a single pin touched her skin, the sweetheart.

“He stopped puking last night and his fever broke this morning.”

“Well, I’m glad to hear that.” The dress was a beautiful, aqua, flowy material, that cinched at her waist and had no back, which wasn’t entirely horrible... but the neckline was one of those that dipped low, low, low. “Fili.” Bella mumbled, disconcerted by how much of the front of her tanktop was visible. “The neck…”

Fili hummed softly under his breath, “I know. That’s what the lace is for.” He reached around her and plucked up a flowery lace in the same shade as the rest of the fabric, “Chest, shoulders, back. Taking your comfort into consideration.”

“I love you.” She sighed, and was greatly amused by the way Fili’s hands stilled over the back of the dress where he’d been adjusting the straps. “Oh, come on, you had to have known.”

“I did. But it’s nice to hear it.” Fili mumbled, beginning his fiddling again.

“Not always.” Bella mused out loud.

Fili’s hands turned her around then, his face pinched in the most serious expression she’d ever seen upon it. “Is this about uncle?” He asked softly. At Bella’s hesitation he added, “You don’t have to tell me. But you can, if you want. I live with Kee, I am used to all kinds of mopey sadness.”

“I’m not mopey or sad.” Bella mumbled, motioning for Fili to continue his fitting, “I just… I didn’t want to hurt him, Fili.” She bit the inside of her cheek until she tasted blood.

“I know.” Fili soothed, kneeling to check the hem; “And I think he does too.”

“Does he?” She asked, “Fili, he told me he loved me but he couldn’t.”

“Why not?” He looked up at her from the ground, his fluffy blonde hair obstructing most of her view of his face, “I love you, Kee loves you, Mum loves you. We’ve known you just as long as he has; if we can love you, why can’t he?”

“Because you… well first of all you like me.” Bella pointed out, “Your uncle and I have never had one meeting where we didn’t end up fighting.”

Fili hummed, “My mother has a saying about that, she uses it with Kili and I a lot when we end up at each other’s throat. She said that we shouldn’t worry about arguing; we should worry when we stop because that means that there’s nothing left to fight for.”

Bella paused, “What are the five steps in the design process.” She said, instead of responding.

“Inspiration, Sketch, Drape. Fabric, Sample.” Fili had Bella raise her arms before pulling the dress off of her again, “He’s never dated.” He said, “As long as Kee and I have been alive he’s never dated, no one that we knew of anyway.”

“So what’s special about me?” Bella sighed, slinking back to her chair and flopping down into it sideways, draping her legs over one of the arm. “I know you and your brother, I should be strictly off limits.” And if only she was! Then perhaps she could still call him a ‘maybe friend’.

“You’re just… Bella.” Fili shrugged, beginning to hand stitch the straps with the new, correct, measurements. “We like you.”

Bella fiddled with her fingers, picking at the already chipped blue polish absently, “He’s not in love with me.” She said finally, decisively, “He loves the thought of someone who gets along with his family and who has no interest in his mine or his money. But he doesn’t love me.”

“And you don’t love him.” Fili added. “Right?”

Bella’s heart stuttered as she said, “Right.” and for the life of her she couldn't figure out why.

* * *

Bella’s heart had been through a bit; it had hurt, broken, bent, grown, chilled, warmed, and skipped many, many beats… but it had never stopped before, the way it did when Drogo answered the phone call from Hobbiton Memorial Hospital.

Hamfast Gamgee had gone over to tend to the garden and found Prim on the kitchen floor.

Drogo had flown out immediately, Bella offering to keep Frodo until everything was settled, all the while her stomach was practically eating itself in worry, all she had going into not hopping on a plane right after her cousin.

Kili showed up just after noon, bursting with nearly infallible energy until he caught sight of Bella’s tired, drawn face. “What happened?” He asked, taking the fusing Frodo from her arms before ushering her onto her sofa and grabbing the discarded bowl of Froot Loops from the table and handing it to Frodo, calming him instantly.

“Prim is in the hospital.” Bella sighed, running a hand through her tangled curls tiredly, “Drogo got the call around eleven last night, he went out on the first plane this morning.”

“And you offered to keep Frodo?” Kili asked, leaning against the far wall as the child in question began chewing on the ends of his hair.

“It’ll be too hectic there.” Bella shook her head, “No, it’s better if I keep him until they find out what’s going on.”

Kili nodded, fishing for his phone in his jean pocket, shooting off a quick text. “I told everyone what’s up. Mum sent me down when you didn’t show up for rehearsal.”

Bella’s eyes widened and she sucked in a harsh breath through her teeth, “Oh! I meant to call her but everything is just so jumbled.” She leant forward, resting her elbows on her knees and hiding her face in her hands. “Everything is so jumbled…” She repeated softly, tears stinging at her eyes even as she pressed her fingers against them,

“Hey, hey, hey,” Kili’s weight settled next to her on the sofa and then his free arm wrapped around her shoulders; she could still hear Frodo munching on his cereal on his other side. “It’ll be alright. Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one just remembers to turn on the light.”

The snort that came from Bella’s mouth was completely unladylike; her mother would have been so proud of her, “Did you just try to make me feel better by quoting Dumbledore?”

“It worked, didn’t it?” Kili asked defensively, “Hey, why don’t you go take a shower. Hobbit and I are good here for a little while, aren’t we?” For emphasis he bounced Frodo on his knee, making the baby giggle.

“Is that your way of trying to tell me that I look like shit?”

Kili whistled, low and impressed, “You are having a bad day, Bunny, if you’re saying swear words.”

Bella laughed softly, patting Kili’s thigh as she stood, “I think I will shower. I won’t be but a moment.”

“Take your time.” Kili waved her away, “You need it. Maybe take a bubble bath; you’re just short enough for it to be comfortable.”

“And you’re just annoying enough to get slapped.” Bella mumbled darkly, grabbing clean clothes from her makeshift closet- casual clothes, jeans and an old Tshirt that may have possibly been Fili’s, and locking herself in the bathroom.

She did look bad. Pale and tired, with bags under her eyes and frizzy hair.

And if she sat on the floor of her tub and cried for a couple of minutes while the water drowned her out, well, no one had to know.

She managed to brush her hair out and braid it simply down her back and dress herself without incident and a quick check of her phone showed that she’d only been in there twenty minutes, and that there had been no new message from Drogo since the initial one where he let Bella know he was at the hospital with Prim and would text her when he found out anything else.

Bella emerged from the bathroom with a cloud of steam that would have been amusingly dramatic any other time. “Kee?” She called, momentarily blind as her glasses fogged.

“Still here.” He said, “Frodo fell asleep on uncle a moment ago.”

She blinked as her sight finally returned, “Did you tell everyone?” She grumped, making her way into the kitchen and starting to make tea just for something to do. Kili, Fili, Dís, and Thorin were all camped out in Bella’s tiny living room, the latter with her nephew sprawled out over his chest, drooling on his crisp, white shirt.

“We’re not going to have you go through this alone.” Dís answered, “Whether you want us here or not you’re stuck with us.”

“Kee says you looked like death when he got here.” Fili piped up, “Why didn’t you call us as soon as you heard about Prim?”

Bella shrugged, switching out the mugs under the Keurig and dropping a teabag in the mug that already had the hot water. “It happened very fast.” She admitted. “Kee, come help me, would you?”

Kili bounced up and into the kitchen, pausing to wrap his arms around Bella and hook his chin over her shoulder. “You look better.” He said, before moving away just as quickly and picking up the mug, giving it a quick sip before grunting and delivering it to his mother. “Earl Grey.” He muttered, face pinched in disgust.

Bella laughed, “Okay, wise guy,” She carefully hid the boxes she had taken out and plucked a bag from one, making sure Kili couldn’t see it, before dropping it into the next mug as another took its place, “whose is this?”

Kili raised his eyebrows at the challenge, ignoring the giggles of his family a couple feet away, and sniffed at the new mug, “Peppermint.” He declared with a flourish before carefully bringing it to his uncle.

“Very good.” Bella grinned, setting up another. “And this one?”

As Kili sniffed his face broke out in a smile, “This one is mine.” He said, taking a large sip and then coughing hard as the tea burned all the way down, “Lava!” He gasped, “My favorite.”

“Serves you right, idiot.” Fili rolled his eyes as he stepped forward to claim his own mug when Bella dropped the bag into it and held it out. “Thank you, Bunny.”

“You keep all of our favorite tea around, even if you don’t like it?” Dís asked, eyebrows raising.

“I like almost everything.” Bella argued, reaching for the box of her favorite blueberry blend.

“You hate peppermint.” She pointed out, looking pointedly at her brother’s mug, “You even use spearmint toothpaste.”

Bella chose to ignore her, reaching for her phone instead as it rang. “Hello?” She breathed, her heart beating so hard inside her chest she worried it would crack all of her ribs and burst out like the creatures in those movies that Fili and Kili had subjected her to.

“Bell?” Drogo asked and oh, he sounded awful.

“You have bad news.” Bella said weakly, leaning into Fili as he wrapped an arm around her, grateful for the support as her knees turned to jelly. “Oh my god, you have bad news.” She blinked rapidly; she hadn’t even heard what was wrong yet and she was trying to cry.

“I have… bad news.” Drogo confirmed, his voice a low rasp.

“Well, go on then.” Bella tried to be brave with every eye on her as it was. “Spit it out.” ‘Please, don’t spit it out,’ she thought, ‘please, keep it to yourself so I can live in beautiful, ignorant bliss.’

“She has Cancer, Bell.” Drogo sounded like he was crying; it was fine, Bella was too. “Completely untreatable… She’s known for months. Months. Since before Frodo was born.”

“Before?” Bella whispered, her entire world crumbling around her, “That’s why it’s… that’s why it’s so far along.” Her eyes locked on Frodo, unaware of all the horrible, horrible things happening to their world as he napped in Thorin’s arms. “They couldn't treat it while she was pregnant.”

“And once Frodo was born it was too late anyway.” Drogo finished, “It’s why she didn’t tell us. She didn’t know what we would say; we would have been having to choose between her and Frodo when she’d already made up her mind.”

“She chose Frodo.” Bella wiped at her eyes, managing to smile despite it all, “I’m not surprised.” She paused, trying to gather the courage to ask what needed to be asked, “How long does she have?”

“A month.” Drogo whispered, “Maybe two, maybe not even one. They’re really not sure except for it won’t be long.”

“I’ll bring Frodo.” She decided, “We’ll be there tomorrow.”

“No.” Drogo was shaking his head, Bella could hear the air displace, “Not tomorrow. In a week. When everything is stabilized and she’s comfortable.”

Because that’s all that they could do now, keep her comfortable while she died. “How did she hide it from us for so long?”

“She was going to doctors in Bree.” Drogo sniffed, “She hid her pills in old pez containers.” Bella had noticed her keeping those around. She was the only person they knew who had ever liked the nasty things; it had come in handy, apparently.

“Pez containers.” Bella repeated absently. she felt like she was a million miles away underwater.

“Yeah…” Drogo trailed off, “Hey, the doc is here I gotta go.”

“Okay.” Bella swallowed around the lump in her throat, “Thank you for calling me.”

“Of course. Bye, Bell.”

“Bye, Drogo.”

She hung up, the phone falling limply from her numb fingers. Everyone was staring at her, “She has maybe two months.” She whispered, eyes locked on Frodo as she clung to Fili like he was the only thing holding her upright; which he was.

Kili came in on Bella’s other side, pressing a kiss to the side of her head while his arms wrapped around her shoulders.

“She’s going to die…” She couldn’t look away from Frodo, even if she wanted to, “Oh. Frodo, you never even got to know her…” She whispered reaching up and wiping frantically at her eyes.

When Bella’s vision cleared again Dís had Frodo and Thorin was lifting Bella up, a relief to her weak knees. Her fingers tangled in Thorin’s shirt as he settled on the sofa with her. He seemed uncertain, like he didn’t know how to deal with her after he’d settled her next to him, tucked against his side while she tried to get her breathing under control.

Fili and Kili settled on either side of them while Dís took up the single chair, Frodo happily oblivious in her arms, his tiny hands wound into her hair again already.

Bella should have moved away from Thorin, should have leaned to the other side and took her comfort from Kili, but Thorin ran so warm and he smelled like all the best things in life so she stayed where she was, her eyes open and locked on Frodo as he breathed in and out on Dís chest.

“He never got to know her…” She said again, miserably.

How was she supposed to process this? Primula Brandybuck-Baggins, Bella’s best friend since they were both barely four years old, was going to die. She didn’t remember life without Prim, had never thought she’d have to find out what it was like.

“You’ll tell him.” Kili said softly, his fingers pushing the stray hair that had escaped her braid back off her face, “I don’t remember my dad, but mom and Fee have told me so much that I feel like I know him even if I can’t remember what his smile looked like without looking at a picture.”

Bella nodded, chewing on her bottom lip. “You’re right.” She said as she dropped her head against Thorin’s shoulder, “Thank you all.” She whispered, “For staying.”

“ _Namaduh_.” Fili said simply from Thorin’s other side. “Sister.”

“You’re family.” Kili added, “Which means that Prim, Drogo, and Frodo are too. _Nê kikûn inthir_.”

“Never forget.” Thorin murmured to her gently, a translation and a repetition.

“We would never leave you.” Dís promised quietly, “Not now, not when we’ve all done this before. This horrible, oppressive _waiting.”_

Bella nodded, holding out her arms silently as Frodo began to fuss.

With her nephew in her arms Bella felt a little more tethered to the world around her, less like she was free-floating in space without a helmet. Frodo peered up at her with wide, innocent blue eyes. He had no idea.

“Good morning, sweetheart.” She whispered, pressing her lips to his forehead and just staying there for a moment.

“Ah!” Frodo chirped, patting at her cheek, “Ah! Ah!”

“Really?” Bella asked, pulling away to look down with a watery smile. “Are you sure that’s what happened? Because I remember it differently.”

“What is happening?” Thorin whispered to Fili and Bella nearly laughed.

“He’s telling a story.” Kili hissed, “Shh, I think it involves dragons.”

* * *

Unfortunately “A month or two” turned out to be two and a half weeks. Bella was still in Hobbiton when Prim died, sleeping beside her bed, their hands twined together when the frantic beeping of the heart monitor woke her up.

The Code team ushered her out into the hall where she was quickly joined by a gaunt, harried Drogo. When the doctor reappeared at the door, his eyes downcast, Bella collapsed into her cousin’s arms.

The funeral was huge, every single inhabitant of Hobbiton showing up to pay their respects to sweet Prim, who owned the bakery they had been going to for most of the last sixteen years. She made their birthday cakes, their Christmas pies, their wedding cakes… no important moment was complete without Prim’s goods.

Everyone loved Prim.

No one wore black, Prim had made it quite clear that she would haunt anyone who dared to wear black to her funeral. No, everyone was to wear bright colors and something green; Prim’s favorite color.

Kili had come down for Bella, to be someone who was there just for her. A warm solid presence at her side.

It was warmer in the south than it was in Erebor; Bella’s green coat having been exchanged for a cardigan in almost the same color but Bella still spent the whole service tucked into Kili’s side and shaking like she was slowly freezing to death.

Her world was officially Primless. Bella would no longer be able to send Drogo to sleep on the sofa while she and Prim turned the bed into a fort and watched old Disney movies in their pajamas; there would be no more two AM trips to the 24/7 diner for milkshakes; no more Midnight movies; no more brownies for breakfast.

“The world seems a little dimmer, now.” Bella whispered to Kili before she stepped forward to lay her flower on the coffin. She’d chosen a sunflower, not the traditional white rose; Prim had hated roses. Always had. Said she had gotten tired of people assuming that her name was Primrose and developed and abhorrence to the things.

Sunflowers were her favorite.

“There were hundreds of sunflowers at her wedding.” Bella remembered out loud, “Hundreds, Kee. They were everywhere.”

“Yeah?” Kili asked, tangling their fingers together. “That sounds lovely.”

“There were so many that the whole beach smelt of them; they even overpowered the smell of the ocean.” If Bella closed her eyes she could still smell them; tinged ever so slightly with the salty tang of the sea.

It had been a beautiful wedding; no one had worn shoes, the skies had been perfectly blue, and Prim and Drogo had been so perfectly, deliriously happy.

“We had them woven into our hair,” Bella said, “all the girls. I felt a little too old for ornamentations like that, but Prim had wanted it. And they looked nice with the red dresses.” Her lips twitched into a smile, “I mentioned it to her. And she threw her bouquet at my face and asked how my wedding would be then, if I was such a grown up.” Bella shook her head, “I didn’t know.”

“Do you know now?”

Bella thought about it; “I think I want to be married on the beach,” she said, “like Prim. But I want to wake up in the morning, and put on my favorite dress, and just walk there. Barefoot, with flowers in my hair because Prim would have insisted…” She swallowed hard, “Not sunflowers, though… Daisies.”

“That sounds beautiful.” Kili said softly, pressing a kiss to the top of Bella’s hair, “How long were they married?” He asked after a moment.

Bella looked at Drogo, holding Frodo a few feet away. He was pale and drawn in his grief and Bella wished she knew how to help him “Six years.” She answered, “As of last month.”

She looked up at the sky as the first raindrop hit her cheek and the smile that turned up the corner of her mouth was anything but joyful, “Look, Prim,” She said softly as the rain started in earnest, “even the sky is crying for you, today.”

Kili traveled with her back to Erebor, and honestly Bella spent the whole time napping on his shoulder, completely wiped from the past couple of weeks; the past couple of months, really.

Kili’s heart hurt with how tired she was; she’d done a good job of hiding it for the most part, but after knowing Bella for as long as he had -very nearly a year- he’d figured something was up when she began always wearing concealer and foundation.

He didn’t necessarily like planes, he wasn’t a fan of not having his feet on ground. But he braved it twice in a week for his big sister.

She wasn’t that much older than him, ten years, maybe.

She could sensibly be his older sister, instead of the woman who his uncle was in love with. Bella was only twenty nine, not even thirty yet, and she looked as tired as if she was ninety. It broke Kili’s heart.

Kili threaded his fingers in Bella’s hair, untangling the long strands gently while she slept. The attendant showed up halfway through the flight, smiling brightly at the pair of them.

“Can I get you and your girlfriend anything?” She asked and Kili had to look both ways to make sure she was talking to them.

‘What? Girlfriend?” He looked down at Bella, “No, she’s not… she’s my sister.” His eyebrows furrowed, “You thought we were a couple?”

The woman looked like she wanted the floor of the plane to swallow her where she stood, “I’m so sorry.” She said in a rush, “You just look about the same age and you’ve been like that the whole flight and-”

“No, no, no, it’s okay!” Kili waved the arm that Bella wasn’t laying on, “I was just curious.” His lips twitched up, “Our brother is going to get a kick out of this though, thank you. This is the best thing to come out of this trip.”

“What were you in the south for, if you don’t mind me asking. Hobbiton is a long way from Erebor.” She asked as she set about refilling Kili’s Coke wuth a flirtatious smile.

Any other time he would have appreciated it, even with Tauriel waiting for him back home it was nice to know that people in general thought he was good looking.

“Funeral.” Kili mumbled softly, his gaze returning to Bella; it was the most peaceful he’d seen her since his uncle had gone and mucked everything up.

There was a moment of silence and then a few mini-bottles of booze inside two red cups were set down in front of Kili and covered with a napkin. When he looked up the flight attendant was already moving on and he couldn't help his smile.

They landed in Erebor an hour and a half later.

“Is she drunk?” Dís demanded as Kili led a giggling Bella into the main area of the airport. She had been waiting, impatiently, with Thorin and Fili who were both watching the proceedings with no small amount of astonishment.

“I am too.” Kili admitted, veering alarmingly to the left with Bella until his brother leapt forward and caught the both of them. “Thanks, Fee.” Kili grinned dopily.

“The flight attendant gave us free booze after she found out where we’d been.” Bella mumbled, thoroughly distracted by the buttons on Fili’s jacket.

“First she thought we were a couple.” Kili whispered conspiratorially to his brother, just loud enough for absolutely everyone to hear it.

“You and Bella?” Dís asked, eyebrows raising as she turned to her brother. “I told you she was too young for you.” She said, confident that neither her youngest son nor her friend would remember this when they sobered up.

Thorin just grunted.

Kili nodded jerkily, “Yeah, that’s right. She thought Bella was m’ girlfriend.” He rolled his eyes but seemed to regret the gesture as he nearly fell over.

Bella shrieked out a laugh, throwing her arms out wildly until Thorin stepped forward and caught her around the waist, her momentum sending her tumbling into his chest, tripping over her own feet in the heels she’d almost gotten used to wearing. “Oh!” She peered up through glassy eyes and broke out into a bright, carefree smile. “Mr. Oakenshield!” She said.

Thorin swallowed hard; she never looked that happy to see him when she was sober. He was going to have to commit the sight and sound to memory. “Hello, Miss. Baggins.” He said.

“‘s Bella.” She told him, reaching up to pat his cheek gently. Her eyes widened, “It’s so soft…” She murmured, her other hand rising to join it’s match as they both threaded through Thorin’s beard.

Thorin looked up, panicked, at his sister and one sober nephew only to find them both giggling into their hands with their phones up. He scowled.

“Was it this soft when you kissed me?” Bella mumbled, more to herself than anything. “It’s so soft.” She repeated.

Thorin made a low, distressed sound in the back of his throat. She was in his arms, but she was drunk, and speaking of him kissing her as though it hadn’t offended her to the point where they didn’t speak to each other for months while petting his face.

He was a good person. He didn’t deserve this.

Bella fell asleep on Thorin’s shoulder on the way home, her hands having settled on his chest instead of in his beard which was only a small blessing; though the extra barrier of his shirt between her skin and his was just as welcome as it was disappointing.

“Uncle.” Kili whispered from Bella’s other side, Fili having claimed the front seat with Dís, “Uncle, do you still love Bella?” His words were slurred with alcohal but to the point where Thorin could pretend that he didn’t understand.

“What?” He looked up and caught his sister’s eye in the rearview mirror. She shrugged apologetically.

Kili was nineteen, she couldn’t control what came out of his mouth any more than she could control the weather, as was proven when he repeated his question, “Do you still love Bella?”

“No.” The lie felt thick and heavy in in his mouth, like mollasass, “No, I don’t.”

That wasn't the answer Kili wanted to hear. His eyebrows furrowed, eyes darkening as he scowled. “You don’t fall out of love with someone that quickly!” He whispered.

“What does it matter?” Thorin asked roughly, “She didn’t love me.”

“No, no, no,” Kili shook his head, “it does matter.” He said, voice low and urgent, “Because Bella thought you couldn’t love her, because you always fought and you didn’t like her. And Fee and I told her that she was wrong, that you wouldn’t say you loved her if you didn’t and she...she was right. If you don’t love her anymore then you must never have loved her in the first place.”

Kili didn’t say any more after that, and Thorin didn’t try to respond. He just looked down at Bella, sleeping off her alcohol -rum, if he knew her, which he did- in his arms.

He’d lied; Mahal had he lied.

If there was one thing Thorin knew, if was that one didn’t just fall out of love with someone like Bella Baggins. No, he was probably going to spend the rest of his life as in love with her as he was the moment she’d taken that blow to the head.

He couldn’t seem to make himself care.

* * *

Three weeks after Prim’s funeral, Drogo Baggins died in his sleep. Stress Cardiomyopathy.

He literally died of a broken heart.

Bella got the call while in Dís’ office, informing her that she was now the sole guardian of little Frodo Baggins. Poor, sweet Frodo who had lost both of his parents in the course of a month before he could even speak.

Bella sat numbly in her chair, her fingers gripping at her phone so tightly that her knuckles turned white. Dís sat across from her, concern etched on her lovely face.

“What happened?” She asked gently.

“Drogo is dead.” Bella whispered, looking up to meet Dís eyes, “He died in his sleep last night.”

Dís hand flew up to her mouth; “Oh my god…”

Bella nodded, sucking in a deep breath through her nose, “I… I’m Frodo’s guardian.” She said, “I’m his Godmother.”

“Yes, yes of course. Kili will go with you to go get him-”

“No.” Bella said, “No I think… I think I’m going to go back to the Shire, Dís. My apartment here is no place to raise a child. It’s so small and I can’t really afford anything else.” She swallowed hard, “I have a house in Bag End and Willemina Took emails me about once a month to let me know that my old job is still there if I ever dd to go back…”

“I understand.” Dís said, though she looked anything but happy about it. “If this is what you think you need to do then… then we will support you in any way you can. But know that you have a home here too, Bell.”

Bella allowed herself a small, tired half-smile, “ _Nê kikûn inthir_.” She said. Never forget. And she wouldn’t.

When she first arrived in Erebor she thought it’s people were as cold as it’s weather; that all they cared about was their smokey old mine and their money. But there was so much more than that. Fili and Kili showed her that on the first day they dragged her out, to the park where she met Kili’s starlight, Tauriel.

The people of Erebor weren’t built like the people of Hobbiton, they couldn’t be. They had to be made of tougher stuff to survive. But they were still people; people who were as surely Bella’s family as her neighbors in the Shire.

And oh, she was going to miss them.

Fili and Kili helped her pack, quickly, and effeciantly, understanding her need to get back to the south as soon as she possibly could even if they didn’t necessarily wish for her to go.

It didn’t take long to box up her little apartment; with all of it’s late night Etsy purchases and it’s alcove above the living room. She couldn’t take much with her as she was flying; most of her belongings would have to be sent for later, but it felt like something to do while she waited for the soonest flight she could catch to Hobbiton.

Frodo was staying in Brandy Hall until Bella could come and pick him up and she was loath to make him stay in that place one second more than he absolutely had to.

She only packed a carry on, not needing much more than her clothes and toiletries. Bag End was her home, it was already furnished with several lifetimes of memories; both hers and Prim and Drogo’s, and it would always welcome her back.

“It’s a curious thing.” She sighed, looking up at her gate. Thorin stood behind her, having offered to carry her bag inside for her for a reason she didn’t know and didn’t wish to look too far into. She’d made her peace with the Thorin Thing, “I am heading towards one home, but in order to do so I have to leave another.”

“Like you said of Bag End, Erebor will always be here to welcome you home should you choose to return.” Thorin said from far closer to Bella than she would have thought.

Bella turned then, smiling a watery smile of thanks. “I appreciate that gesture.”

“It is more than a gesture.” He held out her bag, the rough tips of his fingers rasping over the soft flesh of her palm as she took it, “It is a promise.”

“You act as if I’m never going to come back.” She rolled her eyes, “I told your nephews this morning that this was is not a ‘goodbye’ it is an ‘until later’, and you would do well to remember it.”

Thorin paused for a moment before asking, “The last time you spoke to your cousins… did you know it was going to be the last time you spoke to them?”

Bella froze, swallowing harshly past the lump in her throat, “No.” She finally said, “No, I didn’t.”

“I didn’t either;” Thorin admitted, “with my brother, nor my mother, nor my grandfather. I think the last thing I said to Frerin was ‘I’m going to get you for that one, just you wait’.”

“If we spoke to everyone as if it was the last time we’d see them I think we’d forever be shouting ‘I love you’s at the top of our lungs.” Bella mused, looking back as they called a reminder that her plane would soon be boarding. “I have to go.” She said, with a great deal of reluctance.

She looked at him then, willing herself to commit everything about him to memory because pictures didn’t do him any justice at all and even if they did she had so few of him anyways.

“Goodbye, Thorin.” She finally sighed.

“I thought it wasn’t goodbye?”

“I thought you said it was?” She raised a challenging eyebrow, a small part of her enjoying the fact that she was going to leave him the same way she met him; giving him a piece of his own cantankerous medicine.

To her surprise, however, Thorin just laughed. It was soft, but it was a laugh. “Until later, Miss. Baggins.” He held out a hand.

Bella took it. “Until later, Mr. Oakenshield.” Her heart nearly stopped when Thorin brought her hand up to his mouth, pressing a soft kiss to the back of it.

 _“_ Farewell,  _Kurduluh._ ” He said.

“What does that mean?” Bella asked, breathlessly.

“They’re well wishes.” Thorin lied, “Now go. You have a plane to catch.”

Bella gave him one final smile, brighter than the sad, half-smiles she’d been prone to as of late, before turning and walking away from him, and everything he stood for -Erebor, family, the prospect of a good argument, endless, endless frustration.

Thorin watched her go, his expression crumbling the very second she turned away and continuing to fall with every step she took away from him.

He dared her to look back. Just for a moment; if she thought, for one moment, that he didn’t love her as he said he did she need just look at his face as she left him behind.

“Look back.” He whispered, “Look back at me, Bella.”

She didn’t.

* * *

Things happened very quickly once Bella returned to Bag End; first and foremost she went straight from the airport to Brandy Hall where she quickly liberated her very confused, very crabby nephew.

Then, she set about fileing the adoption papers; while she was his legal guardian she wanted it to be as official as it possibly could be. After that it was the task of moving back into Bag End, fending off curious neighbors, and settling all of her cousin’s affairs.

She wasn’t happy, not like she thought Bag End would make her happy (and more often than not she found herself longing for the mountain views and cool breeze that Erebor provided) but she was content enough in her routine.

Nothing particularly exciting happened, and honestly everything was almost exactly the way it was before she left, except now she had Frodo trailing along after her and she spent a good deal of her free time alone with naught but him for company.

Wake up, bathe, get dressed -in clothing much more sensible than that ridiculous garb Fili and Kili were fond of dressing her in-, make her and Frodo breakfast, go to work, come home, Skype with the boys and occasionally Dís (not Thorin, never Thorin), make dinner, go to bed.

Repeat.

Repeat.

Repeat.

And then Gandalf came. He arrived after dinner one night, when Bella was just finishing the dishes and Frodo was sleepily scribbling in a coloring book.

“I was wondering, Miss. Baggins,” he said quite pleasantly, “if you wouldn’t mind having a cup of tea with me.”

“No, no I wouldn't mind.” Bella smiled, honestly quite glad for the company. “Please come in. What brings you here?” She asked, “Last postcard you were in Rivendale and that was barely a week ago.”

“I can’t just stop by and say hello?” He asked.

Bella raised an eyebrow and set about making tea, “What kind would you like?” She asked, opening the cabinet and almost losing her breath at how much tea there was. “I have everything.”

“Earl Grey, please.” Gandalf said, taking a seat next to Frodo at the kitchen table before grabbing a free coloring book, selecting a crayon, and joining Bella’s nephew.

(Bella subtly grabbed her phone and snapped a couple of quick pictures to sent to Fee and Kee later.)

She grabbed the Earl Grey for Gandalf and the peppermint for herself.

“I thought you hated peppermint, dear?” Gandalf asked when she sat down across from him.

Bella shrugged, passing Frodo a Capri Sun, “I guess I developed a taste for it while in Erebor.”

“I guess you did.” Gandalf hummed thoughtfully, “Well I guess we should get right to the point.”

“What happened to ‘just stopping by and saying hello’?”

Gandalf just smiled, “You know me far better than that. I am here to let you know about a matter referring to The Blue Mines.”

“Thorin’s mine.” Bella’s eyebrows furrowed. She’d never had anything to do with the mines, even while she was in Erebor, and she definitely hadn’t since she left three whole months ago. “Gandalf, those mines have nothing to do with me.”

“Aha!” Gandalf raised a hand, “That is where you’re wrong my dear. They have everything to do with you, now.”

Bella’s heart dropped. “Gandalf, what did you do?” She asked, though she was nearly positive she didn’t want to know.

“You’re aware that Thorin doesn’t own the mine itself, correct? Just the company.”

“I am.” Bella nodded.

“Good, good. Then it won’t be too much of a surprise to find out that I am the owner of that particular mine.  Or I was, until about seven o’clock this morning.”

“What happened at seven this morning, Gandalf?”

Gandalf’s smile was impish and somehow Bella knew what he was going to say before he said it, “Why, I signed them over to you, dear.”

Bella was furious. What was she supposed to do with a mine? She had no idea how mines worked! She barely understood what it entailed owning her house let alone something as huge as a mine!

What was Gandalf trying to do?

But, as she looked over the papers, long after Frodo had fallen asleep on the bed next to her, she noticed something alarming; Arkenstone Mining -Thorin’s company, the company he was so proud of despite all the problems it had caused his family- was failing. He’d raised the wages after the strike, but as she’d heard Dís worrying about, the incoming funds didn’t cover it.

The company would have to close in the next couple of weeks if this kept up.

The very idea made bile rise up in Bella’s throat. Those mines were all Thorin had; all Bard, and Bombur, and Bofur, and Bifur had.

They couldn’t close.

She called her lawyer the next morning.

* * *

Bella Baggins had changed a lot of things in Erebor, most of them for the better, Thorin figured as he stepped into the mine, the day after it closed, and found himself not alone.

Bard was waiting, a sheet of paper held in his hands, as he leaned against one of the beams, trying for casual. “Took you long enough.”

“I didn’t know I had a standing appointment.” Thorin drawled, lips twitching into a smile. He rather liked Bard, once he’d shaken his father’s influence.

“Good to see you’re still a real person, what with Bella back in Hobbiton. Sad businiess about her other cousin; Drogo was a good guy. Cooked really well.”

“You knew him?” Thorin’s eyebrows rose.

“He came to visit a couple months back.” Bard blinked, “Bella kept complaining that he left his shoes laying around.”

“He was her cousin?” Thorin breathed, remembering that time he’d gone to return her book and almost screamed in jealousy, thinking he’d found the reason that she’d rejected him and that reason was another man, one she already loved.

Technically, he was correct. She did already love Drogo, just not in the way Thorin had assumed.

Something clicked into place behind Bard’s eyes and his mouth curled into a smirk. “Oh.” He said, “I understand it now.”

“Understand what?” Thorin asked impatiently, not at all liking that expression.

“Why she would never talk badly about you. Why she always seemed to think that everything would be alright as long as we didn’t give up on you. Why she had your jacket that one time.”

Thorin coughed, ears burning. “You certainly do not know why Bella Baggins had my jacket.” No one knew about that particular instance aside from himself and Bella. They’d silently agreed that the one time Thorin Oakenshield saw Belladonna Baggins shirtless was to remain secret.

“But I do know about the rest.” Bard was still smirking, “How long have you been in love with her?”

Thorin thought back, “I really don’t know. I didn’t realize it until the riot.”

“You don’t know what you have until you almost lose it.” Bard agreed, “Word of advice from someone who has lost it: don’t.”

“There’s nothing to lose.” Thorin admitted, “She doesn’t love me. I told her how I felt and she… I didn’t dare to think someone like her could care for me, but I had to tell her.”

“She doesn’t hold you in as low regard as you may think. Remember, I already told you she told us not to give up on you. She never spoke bad of you.”

“She is a good person.” Thorin said, “She is so many things but above all she is good. She would never speak ill of anyone.”

“Well,” Bard mumbled, “she certainly had a lot to say about your father.”

Thorin snorted, “Doesn’t everyone?” He asked dryly. “Did you come here just to talk to me about Bella Baggins?”

Bard shook his head, holding out the paper Thorin had noticed in his hand. “This is list of everyone who would be willing to work for you, should you ever open up again, and their phone numbers.” He smiled, “Bofur, his brothers, and I are at the top.”

Thorin ducked his head, a wide grin spreading over his face, “Thank you.” He said with feeling.

“Good luck, Thorin.” Bard pushed off the beam, heading for the exit, “And don’t forget what I said. Don’t lose it.”

“There is nothing to lose.” Thorin repeated, his eyebrows furrowing.

“Are you sure?” Bard asked, and then he was gone.

* * *

She was too late. Bella nearly wanted to scream in frustration at the empty mines before her. She wanted to scream and cry and kick at things until she felt better; but there was a ten month old child attached to her hip and she had to act like a responsible adult.

And responsible adults did not scream, cry, and kick things.

“Oh, Frodo…” Bella sighed, “Can we never do things on time?”

Frodo gurgled happily back at her.

“Are you here to gloat, Miss. Baggins?” Thrain called from behind her, “Or maybe just to appraise your new property?”

Bella froze for a split second before her spine straightened and she turned, a horrible, rolling fury boiling just under the surface of her polite smile, “Mr. Oakenshield.” She said.

“He’s not here.” Thrain said, ignoring her greeting. “I don’t know where he is. He disappeared right after the mine closed. Not that you care, mind.” He sneered, “Not quite sure what he sees in you.”

“You told me, when you burst into my house and accused me of being all manner of nasty things, that I didn’t know your son. You were right; I didn’t know him. But if you think for one second that I would come here and hold this over his head then you need to walk away and never speak to me again. Because I would never do something like that. I came here to help him.”

No one could tell her where Thorin was, they could simply tell her where he wasn’t. He wasn’t in Erebor. That was it. That was all the information they had- or all the information they were willing to divulge.

Fili and Kili were overjoyed to see her and Frodo, nearly combusting when she told them she could only stay the one night. But they made the most of that one night; it was almost like she’d never left.

The only flight Bella could get the next day had a three hour layover in Bree Which, honestly, could have been worse. It gave her time to get something to eat and to let Frodo run around and stretch his legs.

“' _Ikhuzh, Ghivashel_!” Bella called as Frodo started to wander away from her, enjoying the new phrases Kili had taught her the night before. It translated roughly to “Stop, sweetheart”. “I think we’re going to teach you _Khuzdul_.” She said idly as Frodo made his way back to her, his little arms wide as he dropped into her arms with a happy cry, “Raise you to be bilingual. That’ll look very good on your college applications.”

Because that was what she had to worry about, that was the biggest thing in her life: making sure that Frodo was happy and well taken care of.

She’d never wanted to be a mom; when Frodo had been born she’d told Drogo that she had no intention of ever having children and she hadn’t. She’d been thrown into the role of Mommy too quickly and with too little preparation but it was her life now and she was going to do right by Frodo.

Bella lifted Frodo up into the air, making funny faces at him as he wiggled and squirmed in her hold, giggling furiously. “What do you think about that?” She asked, settling him back against her hip, “Do you want to speak _Khuzdul, Ghivashel_.”

“Your pronunciation is a little southern, ”

Bella whirled around so quickly that she nearly toppled over, batting away her hair impatiently with her free hand when it flew into her face.

Thorin was standing in front of her, tall and smiling and just as lovely as she remembered and it was like she was breathing for the first time in months.

She’d missed him. For all that they bickered and fought Thorin had become an integral part of her life and she’d missed having him around.

“Thorin.” She breathed, her face breaking out into a grin.

She smiled bigger when he was around; she yelled louder, got angrier, and cried harder as well, but she smiled bigger and she laughed louder. She just felt everything so much stronger with him around.

“Belladonna.” He used her full name for the second time and this go around Bella realized she didn’t mind so much, “Where are you headed?”

“Hobbiton.” She said, her smile still so wide it threatened to split her face in half, “I was in Erebor.”

Thorin ducked his head to hide a smile and pulled something from his pocket, hiding it in his closed fist, “You can take a guess as to where I’ve been.” He let his fingers fall open and sitting in his palm was a single, purple flower.

Bella had to laugh, “You’ve been to Bag End!” She said, surely, though there were plenty of other places he could have plucked a Belladonna flower she knew, “I thought Drogo had gotten rid of all of these when Frodo was born. But why were you there?”

“Isn’t it obvious?” He asked, “ And I found it in the hedgerow. You have to really look to find them, which is good since they’re poisonous and Frodo seems to be at that age where everything goes into his mouth.”

Sure enough, when Bella looked down to try and shield her blushing face from Thorin’s intense gaze her necklace was in her nephew’s mouth while he leaned sleepily against her shoulder, officially worn out by their long day of traveling, “Yes, he certainly is.” She didn’t address his question; it was obvious. He had traveled across the country to see her. “And no matter how many toys I buy him for it he only seems to want to chew on things that he shouldn’t.”

Thorin chuckled, “Fee and Kee were the same.” He paused, just looking at her for a moment before he asked, “What were you doing in Erebor?”

Oh! “I almost forgot.” She dropped to her knees to rifle through her bag, looking for the file Gandalf had put together for her, “Gandalf he… he helped me come up with something.”

Thorin knelt in front of her, stilling her movements with a hand over both of hers, “Just tell me. I’m sure you have those papers memorized front, back, and sideways by now.”

Bella swallowed hard, bracing herself for a moment before she looked up to meet his eyes.

She was kneeling on the ground of Bree airport, with a man she claimed to not love -not even like, she had said at the time- and for some reason all she wanted to do was kiss him.

“I…” She swallowed, “I have a lot of money, now.” She said, quickly looking back at Frodo who had shifted his position when she’d dropped to the ground and was now sleeping soundly against her shoulder,  “Because of Gandalf and his investments I have far more money than I know what to do with, truth be told. More money than I could ever spend. And right now it’s just… sitting in a bank account collecting dust. And so I talked to Gandalf and my cousin Wilhelmina who is very good at this kind of thing, and they both told me that I could invest this money in, say, a small company…” She reached up and pushed a curly lock of hair out of Frodo’s eyes while he slept. “A small, mining company.”

Thorin’s hand cupped the back of her neck then, hot, and calloused, and so gentle she could hardly make herself breathe.

“Your father hates me.” She said, “He thinks I went to Erebor to lord over your or something, like I am remotely possible of even considering-” Thorin’s figure pressed over her lips gently, his smile warm and inviting as he shook his head at her.

“My father is scared you are going to take me away from him; Dís has always been startlingly independant, I was the one he clung to and he is afraid that if you stay I will choose you.”

Bella swallowed. “Should he be?”

“Yes.” Thorin replied with absolutely no hesitation and oh, she wanted to kiss him. She wanted to kiss him so bad. But if she moved in to do it Frodo would wake.

She was stuck.

“Bella,” Thorin sighed, “Belladonna, please do not doubt my feelings for you; in the entire world they’re the only thing I am absolutely sure of.”

“How can I even think of doubting you when you say such perfect things?” She whispered, daring to meet his eyes unflinchingly -though it wasn’t easy with the amount of feeling she saw there.

She always had avoided meeting Thorin’s eyes head on for fear of seeing exactly what she saw then; he loved her.

“I would have asked you to stay.” He said, and the implied ‘if’ was a hundred and three things at once, ‘if I thought you would have’ ‘if you said something’ ‘if I thought we had a chance’.

Bella smiled, “I would have stayed if you asked.”

And then he was kissing her, and this time she was waiting for it, and this time it was perfect. He held her gently, careful of Frodo still sleeping against her side, she wrapped her free arm around his neck and leaned against him, both of them smiling so widely that it could hardly be called a kiss.

“I’ve been thinking,” She whispered, breathless and pink and utterly beautiful under the harsh, airport lighting, “maybe.,.. maybe soulmates are just normal people who are too stubborn to let the world pull them apart.” Even when the fought constantly, even when they didn’t like each other a lot of the time, even when they were from completely different words, even when Bella had only realized that she loved him back when she went to Erebor and he wasn’t there,  they just kept snapping back together like magnets.

Only slightly less violent.

Thorin laughed low, taking Frodo from her as he started to stir, “Well, we are both pretty stubborn.” He said, settling Frodo across his wider shoulder, his smile turning smug as the baby settled almost instantly.

Bella thought her heart would burst. “Are you sure?” She asked, “That you still want… I mean, it’s not just me anymore.” Obviously he knew that, he was holding the child in question, but she had to ask. Had to hear him say it.

“I love you.” Thorin said simply, “And I love everything you come with, tiny person included.”

“Okay.” Bella stood, brushing off her jeans, “Okay.” She said again. She grabbed her purse and marched up to the ticket counter.

Thorin watched her go; he knew she wasn’t leaving, he was still holding Frodo and her bag was still on the floor next to him, but that didn’t answer the question of what, exactly, she was doing.

Until she turned back around with a new ticket clutched in her hand and it all made sense. As she drew closer again, he could just make out Mountain Airlines stamped across the top of the ticket.

Thorin stood, careful not to wake Frodo, and couldn’t help the ridiculous grin even if he wanted to (he didn’t). “You’re coming home with me?”

Bella just smiled and leaned up to steal another kiss.

* * *

**_Two Years Later_ **

Bella’s favorite dress was tan, not white, something Fili whipped up on a whim his last year of school that his namaduh had fallen completely in love with the second she laid eyes on it.

She did walk to the beach, barefoot, with daisies in her hair in a tribute to Prim, where everyone was already gathered. Fili and Kili walked next to her, a bounce in their step that gave away the fact that it wasn’t just a normal day.

Bella kept the flower, the Belladonna that Thorin had plucked from the hedge at Bag End when he went to find her -and she went to find him. She dried it, and pressed it, and tucked it into her the pocket of her dress; her something blue for good luck.

Thorin’s face when he saw her was something she would never forget; the kind of wondrous adoration that pleased her immensely at the same time it made her blush down to her toes. Bard, standing next to Thorin, made a show of tapping his gaping jaw until he shut his mouth.

Yavanna, it had almost turned out so differently.

_“But you weren’t proposing marriage.”_

_“I might have been.”_

And yet there they were; Bella in her favorite dress, smiling so widely it almost hurt, and Thorin standing in front of her, beautiful and ecstatic in the sunlight. She could almost forget that everyone else was there.

“You yelled at me the first time we met.” Thorin said, and Bella had to laugh, covering her mouth with one hand, “And the second time.” He added, “And I still thought that you were the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. It was like… listening to a song for the first time and knowing that it was going to be my favorite.”

“Even if it was shrill and annoying the first twelve times you heard it.” Bella piped up, her smile widening as Thorin huffed. “Admit it, you thought I was too soft.”

“I did.” Thorin nodded, “But then I learned that having a soft heart in world this cruel isn’t weakness…. it’s courage. And that’s where I started to fall in love with you, I think. When you petitioned for the miners during the strike.”

“We fought not an hour later.” Bella remembered.

“Will you be quiet and let me say my piece?” Thorin asked with the air of a man who had expected nothing less but had to at least pretend to be exasperated.

“Never.” Bella said, and while she was pretty sure she wasn’t supposed to kiss him yet she leaned in and did it anyways. She dared someone to tell her she couldn’t.

“Impatient.” He mumbled, pulling away and waving a hand at her, the playful glimmer most associated with Kili in his eyes. “Go on, then.”

Bella loved when she could get him like that, when she could coax out the laughter lines around his eyes. People were so used to seeing him serious and proper that they often forgot that he was related to Kili. The youngest Durin took more after his uncle than anyone realized.

“Thorin Oakenshield,” Bella started, “I love you.” She shrugged, “I figured I should start with that because it took us so long to get...here.” She looked around, grinned at Frodo, now nearly three, sitting on Sigrid’s lap, “I love who you are and I love who you make me. I never wanted to fall in love. Getting married wasn’t even on my radar.I mean, I don’t even like weddings. And then you showed up and smiled at me and before I knew I was sitting in my house in Bag End going ‘Holy crap I screwed up’. When I went back to Erebor and you weren’t there I…” She stopped, sucking in a deep breath through her nose, “But the point is, we got our crap together eventually and now we don’t ever have to say goodbye again; only until later.”

This time it was Thorin who kissed her, as he slid the ring onto her finger, to massive applause as this was apparently when they were supposed to kiss, not that either of them really cared. And this time he really kissed her, the best kind of kiss, the kind that had her bare toes curling in the sand. The kiss Bella would always remember as the kiss that officially labeled her married.

She was married.

Bound in holy matrimony to Thorin Oakenshield.

Bella broke away from the kiss to laugh. “We just got married.” She breathed, feeling like she was about to burst from the seams with how happy she was.

She didn’t think she would ever be that happy, as happy as Prim had been standing on that same beach with Drogo eight years earlier. Oh, she wished they were there with her now; Prim would have been her maid of honor, dressed in green and smiling next to Dís. Drogo would have brought Frodo down the aisle with the rings instead of Sigrid.

It would have been lovely.

But it was still lovely.

Better than lovely.

Perfect.

“We just got married.” Thorin confirmed, his eyes softer than Bella had ever seen them as he looked down at her.

Bella didn’t remember the reception; she knew that she danced, and laughed at speeches, and maybe got a little misty eyed when she realized that Thorin had specifically set places for Prim and Drogo, but she couldn't remember much past her haze of nearly delirious happiness.

She was so happy she was sure she would have floated away if it wasn’t for Thorin’s hand in her’s holding her down.

Frodo had been kidnapped by Sigrid and Tilda, Bella was informed that she was not to worry about him for the next several days as he was being passed around through various friends who were all very anxious for their time with their family’s littlest member.

“But what if I want to see my nephew?” She asked Dís with a frown.

“Then my brother is doing something wrong.” Dís laughed, patting Bella’s cheek affectionately. “You’ll see him when you get back. Until then go and enjoy the time you have not having to constantly chase after a curious toddler.”

“But-” Bella started to argue but her new sister-in-law (!!!!) was already moving away towards Balin and Dwalin. She turned to Thorin, “Did your sister just kidnap our child?”

“Our sister just kidnapped our child.” Thorin said softly, his arms around her waist and his chin hooked over her shoulder.

Bella grinned to herself, relaxing against him, “I suppose that could be handy.” She mused, already imagining getting him home and out of that suit. “Really, really handy.”

“Oh, yeah?” Thorin turned his head to press a lingering kiss to her cheek, “What are you thinking about, _Âzyungeluh_?”

The giggle couldn't be stopped as Bella tilted her head to give him a proper kiss and tell him, “That’s Mrs. Oakenshield to you.”

Thorin outright laughed, spinning her around in the circle of his arms so he could peer down at her face. “I like the way that sounds, Mrs. Oakenshield.”

“It is a bit of a mouthful. Belladonna Chrysanthemum Oakenshield.” Bella wrinkled her nose, “Maybe I should stick with Baggins.”

“Don’t you dare.” Thorin leant down to press their foreheads together, “I think it sounds amazing.”

Bella smiled, pressing another kiss to his mouth before asking, “Oh yeah? How amazing?”

“It’s perfect.” He whispered. “It’s the best thing I’ve ever heard.”

Mrs. Belladonna Oakenshield had thought that she would spend all of her life in the Shire of Hobbiton; an unpopular plan in 2015 but it was hers. It was home, and she had a wonderful house on Bag End, and a job that she loved teaching ballet to children.

She had never thought of wishing for more, of wishing for an adventure in the great wide somewhere. Or at least, she had never thought of speaking those wishes aloud.

But then Dís Durin had called and suddenly -well, not quite so suddenly, it was three years coming- Bella had absolutely everything she never knew that she wanted. Everything she never knew that she needed.

**Author's Note:**

> My first completed long fic omg *confetti*
> 
> ALSO:  
> I've seen posts talking about how turning Bilbo into a girl is disrespectful to the LGBT community -as a pansexual lady I wanna say go fuck yourself- and blah blah blah I'm appealing to the heteronormativity of the patriarchy blah blah blah
> 
> The corset - bare chest scene required Bilbo to be Bella and I ended up falling in love with her so this happened  
> Dont make it more than it is.
> 
>  
> 
> Translations:
> 
> Namaduh - Sister  
> Nadad- Brother  
> Nê kikûn inthir - Never forget  
> Âzyungeluh – my love of loves  
> Ikhuzh -Stop  
> Ghivashel - treasure of all treasures  
> Kurduluh - My heart


End file.
